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1999-2001
Weak of the Week
The best of the worst M ship Applications

For the Week of October 28, 2001
edited by JadeSyren





Email : kink in her britches@lagsquad.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Now what is the difference between answering that question and publically humiliating myself at a "Feel good about yourself"-seminar? Why would I ever get on my knees to suck your clit when all there is to gain is the humiliating experience of you patting me on the head and saying "Ok, you may play with us"? Explain to me why I would ever want to help you wet your cunt by making you think you're such a Class A-Bitch just because you have the control to accept or kick applicants.

I want to see if you have the ability to think and express yourself, and if you understand the site. You just shot yourself in the foot, probably because it was in your mouth.

Is this your idea of what being in total control means? Well wrap it in barb-wire and shove it Joan Pauline II... I'm not going down on you just to get your blessing and approval. And I seriously don't understand how any self-respecting bitch could ever bring herself to that level of degradation. It's disgusting.

You're linking writing an essay to being degraded? You can't voice your opinion within guidelines without feeling insulted?

And what the hell is this manifesto thing then? So to be a good little bitch to you I have to swear allegiance to *that*?! Screw it sister! I'd rather be damned than have to comply with yet another set of rules.

The last thing I need is another Rebel without a Cause or Clue. Why didn't you just tell me what's actually WRONG with it? You know...HAVE an opinion that you can express?

I didn't become a bitch just to let someone else dictate what I may or may not do!

Even if you secretly agree! You are NOT GOING TO BE CONTROLLED, DAMMIT! Even IF it means that you aren't doing what you want to do.

Patriarchy, matriarchy... what's the fucking difference? Sucking a dick at least gives me a fair chance of getting a good orgasmic humping.

If you opt to masturbate, what do you think your chances become? You really AREN'T thinking. At ease. Why is everything related to oral sex, anyway? Get your mind out of your cunt.

Just to point out an example: Why in the name of Lilith should I mutilate myself by not using my body to its full abilities?! Why would I only use my head when I can use that *and* my body to get on top of you? Let's compete for money and power shall we dear sister? And please, don't forget to brush up on your manifesto before we start...

How is not manipulating people a mutilation of your body? Believe it or not, women HAVE had success without fucking their way to the top.

Now lets get down to cases shall we... I don't want to be here... and you don't want me here. Why not?

Why did you ring the doorbell, then?

Well did you think I'm saving my heart for you just because you call yourself a bitch? Hell no darling sister. I'm just waiting for you to stick your neck out far enough for me to slit it... and that's what I'll do if you let me in.

At least you're honest. I like that.

So go ahead... cast your verdict. Reject me and I'll celerate that yet another P/Matriarcal social group has turned me down because I don't play they way they expect me to... the ultimate recognition and trademark of a good bitch.

Accept me... and I'll bitch you right up. I'll have such a ball doing it. Either way, I win...

I don't care if YOU win. I'm keeping you out because you're riff-raff, and you'll just stink up the joint.

It's your move, dear sis...

You don't find it absurd that you write with so much hostility and still call ME sister?

One Liner:
I'm not stupid or insanely masochistic enough to give up a good Fuck-And-Forget session with a studly hard-body just to have my ass kissed by those who need manifestos, one-liners and the self-righteous bashing of others to assert their identity as bitches.

If that's how you feel, why did you apply? Can't get enough rejection at home?



Email : Stew Pid@cs.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I REALLY HATE IT WHEN PPL TRY TO B SOMETHING THEY R NO LIKE I NO PPL THAT BECAUSE THEY HAVE MONEY THEY THINK THEY R BETTA THAN EVERYONE ELSE AND IF WOMEN PETEND TO B WEAK AND FEBLE AND CANT DO NE THING. IT DEGUST ME TO SEE WOMEN SWOONING OVA A GUY WHEN MOST OF THE TIME THE GUYS A PIG AND WILL ONLY UPSET HER. AND THEN OF COURSE SHE WANTS U TO PICK UP THE PIECES WHEN IT ALL GOES WRONG WHICH IT WILL INEVATABLEY WILL. U SOMETIME JUST HA\VE TO TELL IT TO PPL STRAIGHT

Yes. Tell it to me STRAIGHT.

IF THEY R SETTING THEMSELVES UP 4 TROUBLE BUT THEN AGAIN U SOMETIMES JUST HAVE TO STAND BACK AND LAUGH CAUSE THERE SARE THOSE PPL THAT JUST OUT LOOKING 4 SOME ON TO B MESS ABOUT WITH. MOST OF THE TIME I THINK THAT U HAVE B THERE TO KLAUGH IN THERE FACES WHEN IT ALL GOES WRONG. CAUSE NE WOMAN WHO FLINGS HERSELF AT NE GUY SHE SEES IS ASKING 4 TROUBLE.

Guess you weren't CRE-8-Tiv enough to think of "trubble."

BUT THE ONLY GD THING BOUT IT IS TAKEING THE PISS AFTER THEY HAVE DONE ALL THEIR WHININGAND POINTING OUT THAT MAYB IT IS SOMETHING TO DO WITH HER SINCE THE LAST 20 GUYS SHE HAS GONE OUT WITH R DUDS.

What's humorous about this is you can STILL see the grammatical and spelling errors glaring through.

THE BEST THING IN LIFE THOUGH IS WHEN SOME ONE IS COMPAILING THAT THEY R THE LAST TO NO EVERYTHINGAND U NO THAT THEIR B/F OR G/F IS THINKING OF DUMPING THEM ANDU START GOING ON ABOUT HOW SORRY U WERE TO HEAR THAT THEY HAD BROWKEN UP AND THEN SAY U DIDN'T NO THEY DIDN'T NO WHEN THE B/F OR G/F QUESTIONS U BOUT IT. SOMETIMES U HAVE TO B CRUEL TO B V CRUEL

I guess it's a pointless question to ask why you kids think it's cool to toy with other people's emotions, then cry murder when it happens to you.

One Liner:
ITS KIND TO B CREUL,ITS GREAT TO B EVIL, ITS FANTASIC TO TO RIP SOME ONES HEART OUT AND CHOP IT UP INTO LITTLE PIECES AND FORCE FEED IT BACK UP THEIR NOSE

Only if you are one of those kids who is inferior to others. Weaklings are known for this behavior. Misery loves company, even if it's only for a little while.



Email : Strange Wife@cm-people.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Although my husband is a good father to our children, he does one thing that really pisses me off: breathing.

Then the answer to your problem is simple. Marry a corpse next time.

As Kathleen Turner's character said in "The War of the Roses," "It's that constant in-and-out thing that he does!" ("The War of the Roses" is one of my favorite comedies -- it speaks to me on a very personal level.)

Maybe you should stop complaining and get a divorce. I know that you didn't think that these ridiculous statements would get you into Heartless Bitches International.

One Liner:
"Oh, for God's sake, grow some balls and use them!"

I'd rather you grew a brain than some balls.



Email : prattle@btinternet.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
i fucking hate men.they shud all b wiped out and i answered yes to all the questions.

It's a wonder you got through it all. I guess all our colorful pictures helped.

One Liner:
well i tend to hurt men,and if they hurt me i kill them,

Little Miss Dangerous…come on, do you really expect anyone to buy this?

hurt there manhood and pride.

With what? Empty threats?



Email : cooter Bo? Luke?@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I sleep with every and any guy just to spite them.

There's fitting punishment.

One Liner:
Shit Man, Shit!

If you really want to punish them, just talk to them. Your limited vocabulary should have them jamming swizzle sticks in their ears in no time.



Email : mood silly@37.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Whatever. It's not like you want a resume, do you?

Sure. Send me your Heartless Bitch resume. I'd love to see it.

One Liner:
You're too fucking anal for your own good.

No, I'm too fucking anal for YOUR own good. Otherwise, your silly ass would get in here, and then it would suck.



Email : bad breakup@uark.edu

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I have neither the time nor the inclination to suffer fools gladly.

No, you just build a whole website talking about how much a loser your ex-boyfriend was. While I can sympathize with a broken heart, I can't relate to what it would take to advertise that fact on the web.

I'd just as soon leave them in a quivering puddle at my feet as look at them. And I have the mental and physical abilities to do so, despite the fact that I look like a "girly girl."

No, you just talk about them behind their back. I can understand the need to heal, but I don't think you understand the magnitude of the weakness of creating a shrine to your hatred/loathing/resentment of that person. You can't even voice what it is that he did to you. I have nothing against a good rant, but putting a big red slash through his face and flinging insults with no basis (other than the ones you are aware of) just screams how much you love him, not the contrary.

One Liner:
Go ahead....underestimate me.

You make it easy.



Email : Big Joke@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Actually, I'm a handsome beefy male.

I'm going to need a reference on that one. Your definition of handsome might include "Cyclops."

One Liner:
Actually, I just enjoy humiliating little sluts and reminding small breasted women how worthless they really are.

Yes, your definition of handsome is sounding more like my definition of asshole with each word.

I like reminding my girlfriend of my bigger ex girlfriends and sometimes play show and tell by comparing my bitty-ttitied girl to penthouse centerfolds.

Do they remind you that a slug like you is lucky to have a date?







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