Dec 28, 2009
Dec 21, 2009
Dec 14, 2009
Dec 07, 2009
Nov 30, 2009
July 27 2009
April 27 2009
May 26 2008
May 19, 2008
Sep 4, 2005
Aug 2, 2005
Nov 2, 2004
Oct 23, 2004
Oct 15, 2004
Oct 3, 2004
Sep 22, 2004
Aug 24, 2004
Jul 31, 2004
Jul 4, 2004
Jun 20, 2004
Jun 13, 2004
Jun 6, 2004
May 23, 2004
May 2, 2004
Apr 25, 2004
Apr 11, 2004
Apr 4, 2004
Mar 28, 2004
Mar 21, 2004
Mar 14, 2004
Mar 7, 2004
Feb 29, 2004
Feb 15, 2004
Feb 8, 2004
Jan 31, 2004
Jan 18, 2004
Jan 4, 2004
Dec 28, 2003
Dec 14, 2003
Dec 7, 2003
Nov 30, 2003
Nov 23, 2003
Nov 16, 2003
Nov 9, 2003
Nov 2, 2003
Oct 26, 2003
Oct 19, 2003
Oct 12, 2003
Oct 5, 2003
Sept 28, 2003
Sept 21, 2003
Sept 14, 2003
Sept 7, 2003
August 31, 2003
August 24, 2003
August 17, 2003
August 10, 2003
August 3, 2003
July 27, 2003
July 20, 2003
July 13, 2003
July 06, 2003
June 29, 2003
June 22, 2003
June 15, 2003
June 8, 2003
June 1, 2003
May 25, 2003
May 18, 2003
May 11, 2003
May 4, 2003
Apr 27, 2003
Apr 20, 2003
Apr 1, 2003
Mar 16, 2003
Mar 09, 2003
Mar 02, 2003
Feb 23, 2003
Feb 16, 2003
Feb 9, 2003
Feb 2, 2003
Jan 26, 2003
Jan 19, 2003
Jan 12, 2003
Jan 5, 2003
Dec 29, 2002
Dec 22, 2002
Dec 15, 2002
Dec 8, 2002
Dec 1, 2002
Nov 24, 2002
Nov 17, 2002
Nov 10, 2002
Nov 3, 2002
Oct 27, 2002
Oct 20, 2002
Oct 13, 2002
Oct 6, 2002
Sep 29, 2002
Sep 22, 2002
Sep 15, 2002
Sep 8, 2002
Sep 1, 2002
Aug 25, 2002
Aug 18, 2002
Aug 11, 2002
Aug 4, 2002
Jul 28, 2002
Jul 21, 2002
Jul 14, 2002
Jul 7, 2002
Jun 30, 2002
Jun 23, 2002
Jun 16, 2002
Jun 9, 2002
Jun 2, 2002
May 26, 2002
May 19, 2002
May 12, 2002
May 5, 2002
Apr 28, 2002
Apr 21, 2002
Apr 14, 2002
Apr 7, 2002
Mar 31, 2002
Mar 24, 2002
Mar 17, 2002
Mar 10, 2002
Mar 3, 2002
Feb 24, 2002
Feb 17, 2002
Feb 10, 2002
Feb 3, 2002
Jan 27, 2002
Jan 20, 2002
Jan 13, 2002
Jan 6, 2002
1999-2001
Weak of the Week
The best of the worst M ship Applications

For the Week of June 24, 2001
edited by JadeSyren



Email : diarria@trujillo.as

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I"d like to help you but I cant.... sorry......... I'm a heartess bitch.....period.

[So you DO know that these are used at the end of a sentence.]

I cant stand whiny girls who complain about being fat.....and eat cheetos all day...I cant stand dirty pathetic concided guys who swear I want them because I smile

[She sounds like ticker tape.]

.......I cant stand the stupidity....of people in general.......

[I can't stand the stupidity of people in specific.]

One Liner:
"no one is a virgin life fucks us all"

[Poor, poor, you. Wah.]



Email : ladyminerva@poo-poo.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
married 3 times that should explain it all.......

[It explains that you picked some winners at least twice, so your track record isn't good with this third husband. It also tells me that you seem to think that it's not your fault somehow.]

One Liner:
I have no use for women who let thereself get used like ass wipe...

[Remember the days when you were shy about how you listed items on your grocery list? Some people wrote "bathroom tissue," "Charmin," or even the cryptic "T.P." Those were the days.]



Email : Joke@earthlink.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Because I am not afraid to stand up and take it head on. I tell it like I see it. I don't appreciate being told what to do or how to do it ( ask my soon to be x).

[Why? Can't you speak for yourself?]

Don't pick my friends- grab my tits

[There's a problem I have everyday. I have to literally tell people NOT to grab my tits. There oughta be a law.]

or tell me how to act. That is why I once became a cop.

[To tell people to stop grabbing your tits? That's a bit extreme.]

I take no shit - I give it...

[Yeah, yeah.]

One Liner:
like what you see? look but don't touch.

[Where do you live that people just can't keep their hands to themselves?]

You can't keep up with me or afford me! Don't try. Leave it as you see it!

[No shoplifting! You break it, you bought it! Please don't squeeze the Charmin--I mean ass wipe!]



Email : jilted@rrt.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
my last boyfriend ran away with the lunch lady!!!!!!!! any more questions?

[Wow. Does your school do take-out?]

One Liner:
you fuck yourself

[That's a scar you never outgrow. When your guy leaves you for the lady with a fishnet stocking ON HER HEAD, it's time to call it quits on dating. I can just see her seducing your boyfriend across the institutional meatloaf.]



Email : still a failure@klettrooney.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Oh for the love of god I am putting a little effort into this

[Next time turn your brain ON before you engage your fingers. That's effort.]

and you keep telling me my submission isn't good enough. Fine. I am a heartless bitch because I am trying my very best to have my boss's heart cut out and delivered to me on a silver platter. Is that good enough for you heartless bitches?

[Shit no. Even if you actually DID that, you'd still be way out in left field. Why don't you tell me what you think a Heartless Bitch is, since it really doesn't apply to you at the moment?]

One Liner:
Get the fuck out of my way.

[There's your problem. You can't see that YOU are in your way.]



Email : 50ft idiot@ev1.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
i dont care about anyone elses feelings and noone is as important as me

[You're putting me to sleep here. Quick, give me your "good" material.]

One Liner:
i am the bigest bitch in the world next to your mother

[How do you know how big my mother is?]



Email : Rock-stupid bastard@execpc.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Well, Hello there!

I don't think the term 'Heartless-Bitch' is quite appropriate for a guy,

[You've got a gender value problem, don't you?]

and always one to follow decorum, I suggest Cold Bastard (or if you prefer, Cold Blooded Bastard). Why?

[Do tell. Why do you prefer "Cold Bastard"?]

-I think 10,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean is a good start, rapidly followed by 10 million more idiots from all walks of life.
-I watch what passes for evening news and smile at the grim irony of what is considered 'bad news' and feel it is usually well deserved payback from reality for initial stupidity.
-I don't think there is anything wrong with the next generation being fewer than the current one.
-I used to have hope for humanity, before I worked in the service industry, 'nuff said.

[Do you have any opinions that you're not wearing on your lapel?]

-I am NOT a sociopath-yet.
-My motto is: 'Making the world a better place, one bullet at a time'.
-Somedays, I see myself wielding a pike, surrounded by dead bodies shouting to the next person in line: "STEP FORWARD SO I MAY ASSIST THEE!"
-Sensing a bit of hostility? Good. Maybe you'll keep your distance (not YOU, you're kinda cute :-)

[Who are you talking to?]

-To borrow and twist from another HB, I don't hate everyone, just the stupid ones. I can't help it that there is such a high degree of correlation (thanks, Erica)

[I suggest an apprenticeship. Learn from this Heartless Bitch so that you may never be seen here again.]

-If a woman is interested in a man, say so or shut up. If a man is interested in a woman,… well, I say so!

[Tell me that you're not here to date.]

-An intelligent, strongwilled, attractive woman doesn't frighten me,… an intelligent, strongwilled attractive woman with a blade is a turn-on. (an I,S,A woman with a gun…doesn't frighten me either, but it does give me pause)

[…and an erection. Ugh.]

-I don't have time to play head games, I'm out to conquer the world (you think I'm kidding, don't you?)

[I sincerely hope so. You think you're charming. I find you annoying. This is like listening to a pesky kid brother. Shoo.]

-The more I read this site the more I respect you (all), can't you just feel the love?

[Yes, and it feels like you just shot your wad in your pants.]

Like it, don't like it? It all the same to me.

[Don't try to play it cool NOW. I can see through all that saliva.]

One Liner:
Making the world a better place, one bullet at a time.

[Just another way that you're Quick Draw McGraw.]



Email : drink ho@ns.sympatico.ca

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I always smile even when I hate the guy buying me a drink because he thinks he gonna get some....yeh thanks for the drink asshole..see ya.

[Then buy your own fucking drinks.]

One Liner:
(middle finger)need I say anymore!!

[You couldn't possibly say less.]



Email : Ms. Convict@inorbit.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I will not put up with any more bullshit from ANY man. If I feel like talking, we'll talk. If not, they can leave. Everything is on MY terms! I say who and how I am touched and when and if that happens. I am a single parent now-my ex is in prison until 2025.

[Some guys will do anything to get away from her.]

I have become an independent-selfish bitch and am fucking proud to be a woman!

[Oh, like you had anything to do with being a woman.]

One Liner:
Women can control everything-bitch it up and take control of your life!

[You're a stellar example.]



Email : vain@cs.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Because I am 34 years old and I have paid my dues! If I want to shave the bottom part of my head and let the long part flow over or heaven forbid put it up so everyone can see it then I will!

[And hairstyle is so very high on our list of priorities.]

And I did despite that no one likes it my husband, kids, friends included but I DON'T CARE because

[…it will grow back?]

I don't owe anyone anything and if someone doesn't like it they don't have to look because I WILL NOT alter how I look for society.

[You already HAVE.]

I hate gold-digging whores and know plenty of them who have married rich men not because they love them but for a buck...PATHETIC.

[You're pea-green with envy.]

I was a single mother and put myself through college while I worked three part-time jobs, then got married and finished my MBA; get off your gold-digging ass (and close your legs) use your mind and make your own money (To [friends deleted])!

[ o/~ They smile in your face…all the while they wanna take your place. Backstabbers. Baaackstabbers. o/~]

I'm a heartless bitch because I have guts AND I use them!

[To do such daring things as:
Get a funky hairstyle.
Talk about your friends behind their backs.]

One Liner:
Gold-diggers have the same amount of class as prostitutes do so stop holding your head so high!

[This is just eating you alive, isn't it.]



Email : ChanzezAre she sucks@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:

[What would an application look like if written under the influence of nitrous oxide? Let's find out.]

Hahaha.... Heartless Bitch? Me? I'm not vicious: I'm just drawn that way! Hahaha In high school, I co founded the sorority, AMAAH... I'd explain, but if you're as smart as you claim, you'll figure it out! I've never been in a fistfight; my mouth is weapon enough! My job is managing a group of 15 technicians, all male... the day I overslept and came in without makeup, they complimented me by saying I looked less aggressive. Hahaha I never went in without eyeliner again! I've been told that I intimidate men, my response: "only the weak ones!" I've been divorced for 2 years now, and I'm amazed my ex lived through it! I'm not on the prowl for a husband... I plan to "live in sin"... it's much more fun! I also had one of my male employees tell me that I use the word Fuck better than anyone he's ever met! He said that when I say Fucker, I mean it literally! One of my lovers called me "mother Theresa in leather chaps".... So? Do I qualify? Hahaha If not, fuck you very much!

[Now it's our turn to laugh.]

One Liner:
AMAAH

[Sad when you peak in high school.]



Email choke@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I'm a heartless Bitch because...
I say so

[Hey, say no more.]

because I resent when i'm labled "PMSing" everytime i say no or be assertive. And when i mean NO it actually meand NO, today , tomorow, Every day, MOnday through Saturday, and twice on sunday. The whole women get paid 70 cents to every Man's dollar.

[Yeah, like, that whole deal, you know…like, it should be addressed and shit.]

Also i think

[I'd be very surprised if you thought.]

all teenybopper "pop music queens" (ex. britney spears) should be lined up and harpooned throguh the ehad along with annoying blond girls, assholes, all my exs, pantyhose, poodles, pricks, and people who cut you off in traffic. I am assertive, and thats waht i am. I like my opinions and if i let you express yours then its your lucky day.

[How magnanimous of you. As if you could STOP anyone from expressing their opinions.]

I eat men for breakfast and shit out little boys.

[I'd hate to see your ass wipe bill.]

anthing else is purly my buisness so excersice some manners and ask nicly or you aint gettign shit.

[Her spell checker died. Damn, don't you hate when that happens mid-paragraph?]

One Liner:
If I wanted your opinion, I would stick my foot out of your mouth and shove it your ass.

[How would that give you my opinion? I hate it when tough-guy talk fucks up a basic insult.]



Email : Slaxx@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
My friends don't call me "deleted DIVA" just because my last name ryhmes with the noun. It's got more to do with my attitude. In reality, any woman can be a true diva.

[Usually means that she's a pain in the ass used to getting her own way with no sense of logic.]

I only wish more learned that you don't have to be Diana Ross to prove it. Luckily, I think the members of the Heartless Bitches club get the idea...and that's precisely why I'd like to join!

[We HAVE the idea. This is a way to see if YOU get the idea and possess the ability to express it.]

Because I especially loved the pages where HeartlessBitches.com makes fun of those who deserve it,

[Laughing at others is easy. Laughing at yourself is the litmus test.]

here are examples of myself finding entertainment value at the clueless expense of others:

[I can hardly wait *yawn* to see what YOU think is funny.]

1.SCENE: College Frat Party CHARACTERS: Myself, Frat Boy, & Yet Another Passed-The-Hell-Out-From-Being-a-Neanderthal-Drunk-Frat Boy

[If it needs this much set-up, it sucks.]

PROPOSAL: Frat Boy #1 says to me, "Hey, get out your lipstick and draw all over my drunken friend here!!" MY RESPONSE: "I would but my makeup is way too expensive." FRAT BOY RESPONSE: "Wow! Can I quote you on that in my AOL profile??" *Which leaves me realizing why I continue to attend these cheesy fraternity functions: the entertainment!

[Shit, that is funny stuff. "Way too expensive." The wit is just killing me.]

2.I work at a pharmacy in which the downstairs billing department consists of old, crusty, fat and miserable women. These woman started a "Cake Club" (which my friend and I affectionately refer to as the "Cake CULT").

[Oh joy. Fat jokes.]

Every time it is someone's birthday they celebrate with cake.

[Probably makes it a pleasure to work with them.]

Of course, because these woman are old, crusty, fat, and miserable, they've started celebrating "HALF BIRTHDAYS" and such as a means to creating more excuses to scarf down 7 layer cakes.

[They sound fun. They've taken a dull job and found a way to make the time enjoyable.]

Why does this make me a heartless bitch?

[Trust me, it doesn't.]

Because *one day* (the day when they've ordered an especially large cake and can almost taste the chocolate fudge...) I plan to confiscate every utensil in the building until tears of frusturation pour down their self-pitying, useless cheeks!!

[That's why God\dess gave you fingers, idiot.]

I could go on, but I'll save it for the day when I might become an actual member. ;)

[This is a shredded mini-wheat moment. On the wheaty side, I can easily see you never becoming a member, but on the sweet side, I have half a mind to let the OTHER bitches have a little fun with your nasty little mind.]

One Liner:
"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful. Or, hell, go ahead and hate me. I'll still be beautiful." *also I could never leave this out... "I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world. Life's a bitch; you've got to go out and kick ass."-Maya Angelou

[Quoting the bible doesn't make you a prophet, either.]



Email : Stud@one of those lame isps.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I make bitches scream with pleasure

[Every time you go away.]

One Liner:
Glad to see me or did you just pee your pants?

[It's definitely piss.]



Email : dumbbell@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
HA well out of all the things ive done to be a BiAtch well the funniest was with one of my exs....see the ass had screwed me over so many times in our whole 2 years together; cheated, lied all that shit well i decided not to be shit on any more and let him see my inner bitch self so one night on our 2 year aniversary i got a hotel room for us and set it up all kinky and shit.....ropes

[How'd you rent the room? You're only 14.]

and all.....well things started getting really all hot n heavy i was licking him over and he was hard as a brick...so i took off my clothes...tied him to the bed and right when the real fun would have began....I put back on my clothes and kissed him on the cheek and left saying room service wil probaley be up in a few if u want something....and leaving him but ass naked, hard, and tied i left saying thanks for everything u did, the times u cheated and all so u can call this u're reward for all that...muah i blew him a kiss from across the room and left...... As i left i called room service and ordered something and left so thats how he got found!!! and by the way at that time he was covered with all the kinky goodies....whip cream and all....all ready for some fun and well.....let u're mind wander....

[Precisely why your mind needs a chaperone, missy. Get back to bed.]

One Liner:
If you think lifes a bitch....wait til u see me

[If you think life's a bitch, wait until you leave home.]



Email : oof@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Hello I am Jennifer

[Hi, Jennifer.]

and I have been known to involve myself in heartless acts on a daily basis. I do not hate men if.

[If what?]

It is entirely pointless to hate an entire race.

[True, but they are a GENDER. That doesn't make it right, but you've got to master basic terminology.]

However some men make me wonder if they actually have any brains or guts for that matter. I am a bitch to anyone man or woman who cannot spell Mississippi or who doesn't own a full set of teeth.

[I don't know if I'm glad that your standards are low, or nervous that they are so specific.]

Many fear me and they should. Especially the unintelligent oofs who I have come in contact way too often.

[Stop doing it, then.]

One Liner:
The world does too revolve around me.

[Really? Don't show up for work tomorrow and see if they shut down.]



[From the Pukefest files:]

Name: McDoof

hairy balls

[Um, yeah. I can see how that would make you sick.]



Email : urban legend@msn.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Personally I think people in general are idiots. Instead of realizing that they made a mistake; they blame everyne around them and make them pay for it.

[I wonder if you'll shoulder the blame for this one.]

They tie up the legal system so the hard criminals can roam free longer while waiting great example: A woman in Philadelphia is suing a pharmacy, the pharmacist, and a drug company of a contraceptive Jelly because she got pregnant. Problem was she ate it on toast believeing that it was 3 aisles away from the food, she had to eat it to prevent pregnancy. She believes that a busy woman like herself has no time to read directions so she expects everyone, besides herself, to support her child.

[It's an urban legend.]

What is she a moron????? Some people should be shot for their stupidity.

[Or their gullibility.]

I wonder what she does with condoms!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Party favors?]

One Liner:
woman who expects a man to be happy up her ass all the time should just marry a dog.

[I am SO not touching that one.]



Email : poet bore-eate@atlantic.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I wrote a little poem about myself:

Honest:more like blunt.I don'tjust say "I hate you" I say why.
Expectant of the finest chocolates from her servant boyfriend on Valentine's Day.
Always doing things my-way-or-the-highway.
Recognizes the difference between "bitch" and Heartless Bitch".
Tears a man's dick to bits if he tries a lame line.
Learn quite a lesson from me if you push my button.
Eat your heart out, RoseAnn(who, in my opinion is just a plain bitch).
Sexy vixen
Sassy sista

Beautiful(inside and out)
It seems like I'm on my period 24-7
Tight little package
Cunning like a cat...
Tasty like an Oreo
Hasty like a warrior

The little poem's basically self-explanatory.

[No, no hidden depth here. I like that little medieval twist: Heartless Bitcth. Forsooth, thou art my only friend, Heartless Bitcth.]

One Liner:
While making it to the top, it's okay to break a few bones(as long as they're not your own).

[Keep your day job.]



Email : arla@lazy-ass.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Refer to: [website deleted]

[...and this lazy sow had the nerve to require me to register to read it. If you're too lazy to cut and paste, I can't be bothered to read it.]

One Liner:
"You stepped in WHAT?"

[Oh yuck! Quick! Hand me some ass wipe.]



Email : What it means when AOL is #1@AOL.COM

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
BREAK UP MARRIGES LIE TO BOYFRIED DEGRADE PEOPLE SPEND ALL HIS MONEY AND DONT CARE BEAT UP MY FATHER

[I'd be a fool to do your dirty work, oh yeah.]

One Liner:
YOR THE FUCKING REASON I AM A PSYCO BITCH

[No, not taking your medication is the reason that you're a psycho.]









Copyright© Heartless Bitches International (heartless-bitches.com) 1999

Send this page to someone who needs to read it.
go to top

Pause your cursor over each link below for a more detailed description

Home
Search HBI
HBI FAQ
   Rants
   Collected Quotes
   The Manipulator Files
   Nice Guys? BLEAH
   Links
    I'M NOT BITTER...
   Auntie Dote
   Honorary HBs
   Adult Books
   Kids Books
   Privacy Policy
   Awards
   HBI Sitings

---

Want to link to HBI?



  Want to know when we update? Subscribe to our "What's New" RSS Feed

(What is an RSS Feed?)


Get SharpReader - our favorite RSS aggregator - it's free!

If you don't have a Newsreader, you can subscribe to updates via email:

Enter your Email


Powered by FeedBlitz

Add this Content to Your Site