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Weak of the Week
The best of the worst Membership Applications

by JadeSyren

For the Week of July 10th, 2000

Name: Laura and Kerri

[The two of them couldn't come up with one good application between them.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
People think that they can talk to us however they want and not get any stick back - but we've got worse to say! We speak our minds

[Because there's only one between them.]

and don't care who we hurt in the process...heh,heh!! We have one motto in life 'always make sure you get your revenge' and thats a promise - revenge is sweet and anyone who has a problem with us will soon know about it...

One Liner:
If u don't wanna accept that we're bigger bitches than u lot and don't wanna accept us into hbi then fuck off! We've got better things 2 do!

[All I can envision are those twins that spoke in unison when summoning Mothra.]



Email : Heartless@bitch.com.au

[If you can't join us...set up a free addy.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I bloody well am and how dare you ask me to justify my title!!!

[Can't think of a good reason?]

One Liner:
I don't get PMS, I am not going through menopause, I am not mentally ill. I'm just bloody angry! OK?

[Does anger require permission?]

Now watch out for that axe Eugene!

[Who's Eugene?]



Email : nicola@tattletale.uk

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I'm a HEARTLESS BITCH as if anyone say's any fu**ing thing to me i'll slap the dirty cow or stupid bloke !

One Liner:
you fuck wit me you fuck wit my freind bitch!

[Need a little help standing on your own feet?]



Email : fanof@buffymail.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:

I am what i am and nothing anyone can say or do will make me change.
Take me with a spoonful of sugar,

[That's grain of salt.]

empty the sugar bowl if you have to but dont come and whine at me how you dont like my attitude, opinions or behavior because all i will say is " how nice for you" and you'll have 10 seconds before i become irrational

[You mean to say it gets more irrational than this?]

and another 10 to get the hell out of my way before i try and change you psychically.

[There's a threat. I can almost see the fits of laughter this inspires. I'll bet it stops the bullies dead in their tracks.]

One Liner:
Honey, i dont have an attitude problem....You have a perception problem

[Maybe you can fix that for me...psychically.]



Email : jillian@egocentric.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I'm a heatless bitch because I am so bitchy that I don't have to use the fancy HTML to make my submission look good. Because if you don't like my submission thingy,

[Thingy?]

I'll just say FUCK-YOU

[You and everyone ELSE that didn't make the cut.]

One Liner:
East to the Sea, West to the land. Death to the bitch who touches MY MAN!

[Yea TEAM! Shake those pom-pom "thingies", nitwit.]



Email : BLACK_WIDOW_59@capslock.COM

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
no matter the sex of the so called person i will be a BITCH TO THEM.

[Okay, but why?]

PLUS IT IS SO FUN TO BE A BITCH WHAT ELES IS THERE IN LIFE TO BE ONE.

[I'm thinking that you're more of the "what else" variety of person.]

One Liner:
SYMPATHY CAN BE FOUND IN THE DIC BETWEEN SEX AND SYPILLS

[You can only find sex and sypills in a "dic". My Collegiate doesn't carry this entry.]



Email : Tori@ennui.uk

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
If I wan't, would I be writing this?

[Yes.]

hell no

[Still not convincing.]

One Liner:
All this but enough brains to kick your sorry ass

[But can you do it verbally?]



Email : ellipsischick@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:

[William Shatner mode ON:]

because...i am sick of being the nice girl...because...i am tired of men that are stuck in their adolescent years...because...i am fed up with looking for that so called soul mate

[Wouldn't it be easier to just hit the period key ONCE, and end the sentence?]

...because...men do not htink with the heads that are visible to the naked eye

[If you're refering to their dicks, then you can see those with the naked eye. Even the smallest of dicks can be seen without microscopic aid. If you're not referring to their dicks, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.]

...because...i need a change...

[Spock...I am in search of...an...end...to my sentence...]

One Liner:
what does not break you-only makes you stronger

[Completing a thought before starting another would be fatal for you.]





 







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