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1999-2001
Weak of the Week
The best of the worst M ship Applications

For the Week of November 23, 2003
edited by Jadesyren



[From a random idiot:]

I came (no pun intended) across this site, but can't figure out exactly what's up.

Can you enlighten a dumb ass?

[No. I have spent many wasted hours on this herculean task. Well, maybe it's possible, but it's like draining the ocean with a rusted teaspoon, or moving the desert with broken tweezers. It's about as pointless, too.]



Name: Veronica

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Because every time some one getts on my nevres, which is every second of the day, i just start to go off. No matter if it is my mom, dad, sister, or my bf. It just tells me that i should really kick some more ass atleast once a day and not once a week.

[Sounds like you should really grow up, if not once a week.]

One Liner:
Bitch Inwhich That can have your boyfriend in my bed in seconds. And don't care

[Your great accomplishment is fucking around?]



Name: Colleen

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:

[All aboard the Drama Express. Next stop: Trainwreck junction.]

I am fucking sick of dealing with stupid ass men. My parents have been married for 25 years, yet my mom just eats and takes a lot of prozac because my dads such an asshole husband. Hes fucking a lady I used to babysit for. Yeah, my mom's referred to him as a "control freak" since I can remember. Then we have my most significant relationships. The first one, the guy managed to drain my life savings, (5000 for a 17 year old is a fucking lot) get me addicted to heroin (yeah its kinda my fault,

[Kinda? It's absolutely your fault.]

but the pleading and sexual inuendos were too much) loose my parents trust, get in two car accidents in MY NEW CAR (which I have since had revoked due to that shit)

["Who's driving the car?" I guess I should thank you for allowing me to quote American Gothic. How the fuck did you get your CAR revoked, anyway?]

Then the second one, an yugoslavian ex-pimp/gangster/etc

[A Yugoslavian gangster? Are you for real?]

etc (I still dont know what was true) who treated me like shit, fucked around with my friend IN FRONT OF ME, broke up with me, then called because he missed me on my birthday...I allowed him to come over to my little get together with all my close female friends, and he proceeded to try to get on every one of them (who were all disgusted) embarrassing me terribly and pissing myself off for being so blind. I am sick of saving these fucking losers.

[That's the first step to recovery...or one OF the first steps. Start realizing that YOU ARE CHOOSING to deal with people who ultimately use you.]

One Liner:
Never surrender to the allure of losers.

[Losers aren't generally alluring.]



Name: vinny

[Not Dee Dee's vinny?]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
After pondering my hypocondrial delusions regarding the irony of self hatred, I grew a brain. i got the clue. i am officially over myself.

[Convince me to care.]

One Liner:
i am bitch.

[So, after growing a brain, this sentence is the best you have to offer me?]



Name: sally

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
i steel and lie, i am the biggest manipulator in my family i have caused greif and pian stole from my nephews left my homless daughter on the street and stole from my dead sister too. i cause friction between my children and then day i dont want to be involved

[Hmm. Let me see if I can sum this application up in two words.]

One Liner:
drama queen

[Oh. You beat me to it.]



Name: Emily

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
The Following People Should Be Beaten With An Aluminum Baseball Bat:

[Anyone who uses ridiculous lists instead of an honest response.]

Grown women who play dumb, act like children, or pretend to be bisexual in order to seem attractive.

[Women only?]

Women who refuse to take responsibility for their own actions: "I'm probably gonna get really drunk tonight, so could you just make sure I don't get raped or anything?"

[Again, only women refuse to take responsibility.]

A girly little giggle absolutely sets my teeth on edge.

[I think it's in context.]

People (usually women or gay men) who overuse the word "love": "I've only known Jenni for a week, but I LOVE her! We're like sisters!"

[What is WRONG with you? Really, aren't there other people who REALLY deserve a baseball bat? I mean, the easy ones are people who abuse children, elderly or animals. These people you've listed are minor annoyances.]

Women who become way too close, way too fast, and then spend days sobbing when their bestest friend turns out to be not so perfect after all.

[People who think it's so cool to disassociate.]

Women over the age of 15 who sleep with stuffed animals.

[Better one of them than a Yugoslavian gangster like what's her name dated.]

People who go vegetarian because they love animals, but still scream when they see a rat or an insect in their house.

[They don't have to like them to prefer not EATING them.]

Teenage girls who think that the letter U is a pronoun.

[On the other hand, it's okay for guys to behave like buffoons.]

Girls 15 and under who smoke and dress like whores in order to seem grown-up.

[If you're 16, dressing like a whore is O-K.]

Anyone, anywhere, who enjoys "Lizzie McGuire".

[What's she ever done to you? Isn't this a Disney show, anyway?]

One Liner:
Anyone who uses the word "cute" to describe an article of clothing will be thrown, screaming, into the bowels of Hell.

[Go away and never return.]







Copyright© Heartless Bitches International (heartless-bitches.com) 1999
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