Name: Billie

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
What the fuck do you care.I'm on your fucken web site. Just fucken thank me!

[You want credit for just showing up? Your credit is that you found us, which is surprising, considering how many operations must be successfully completed to get here.]

One Liner:
I'm not voluble so fuck off

[You're not VALUABLE, either.]

Name: Ida

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Not only do I get what I want, I also DO what I want,

[It might just be me, but whenever I see this, all I can think of is Cartman, dressed up like an "out of control" teen, saying, "WhatEVA, I do what I want."]

THINK what I want and I will never hesitate to tell you what my opinions are! I believe what I want to and that includes believing that Elvish blood flows in my

[Oh, here we go. Damn you, Legolas-er Orlando Bloom! I know it's all YOUR fault.]

veins. To support that fact I can say, that I am a good archer and an excellent horse-rider and that I speak Elvish (not fluently YET but I am still learning!)I

[Well. Which kind of elf ARE you? There are SEVERAL different races of Elves. Personally, I think you'd better stick with Keebler.]

will defend my beliefs at any stake.

[A stake right through your heart, you moron.]

Problems with men? Hell yeah, but who hasn't got them?

[Nay, this cannot be so. Long ago did the race of Elves amend that ancient enmity 'twixt them and the race of Man.]

My revenge however will be "The Fuck-Off Huge Book of Weirdos" where I will write about all those sorry-ass losers who wanted to date me(too old, too young,

[Someone who believes herself to be an Elf is going to write a book telling WEIRDOS to fuck off?]

too trans-sexual, too satanist, too bigamist)... Hey, I deserve the best you can give me, not some table scraps! And Either I get it my way or I won't have it at all. Either way, I won't be sorry!!

[Too late.]

I do things that give me pleasure, in my personal life as well as in professional. I have several professions,

[Sure, she's a Ranger, a Druid, a Cleric, a Bard. Her alignment is Neutral Stupid. Maybe more like Chaotic Ignorant.]

the most interesting of which is that of the tour guide. And I drive the best car in the world AND KNOW BY MYSELF HOW IT WORKS!!!

[MAGIC! An elvish spell of locomotion.]

I deal with all my pains in the ass one way only and it includes using my foot. Don't like me? Who gives a damn? All you can expect from me is the print of my boot on your ass. No forgiveness & no forgetting... did I mention I was a venomous Scorpio? Oh, and a rain witch also...

[Meanwhile, back on planet Earth....]

One Liner:
I set my own pace. If you don't keep up, I'm so not waitin'!!

[Whither you go, none can follow.]

Name: Alisia

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I'm not going to waste my time having to explain why I'm a bitch. I am and that's all there is to it. I just want a card that's all. You're not getting a one-liner and you're not gonna get my country,it's international. Does it really matter where I'm from?

[You'd get the card in the MAIL, moron. How would we know where to send it? I know! We could ask that Elvish twerp to track you down.]

What the hell do I care if you get your little demographics or not? I'm in it for a card. Enough said.

[Needless to say, Alisia talked herself out of getting the card. If only I had a booby prize to send.]

One Liner:
I told you no!

[You reap what you sow.]

Name: Gaile

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I get sick to my fucking gutts the way men never think they do no wrong, and they think making up is fuckig, and these stupit assbitcheslet them get by with

[I think her keys are stuck together.]

it ! men are are bigger babies then my kids are. And for those stupit women out

[The preferred spelling is STOOPID.]

there, if you all would quit letting all the men walk all overyou, MAYBE you might end up getting a little RESPECT soetime! I earned my repect.

[R-E-P-E-C-T...find out what it means to me.]

One Liner:
I got where I am today by myself,no man,the only place they will get you is to bed! ME,MYSELF,AND I!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[I think I was doing better with the Elf.]