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1999-2001
Weak of the Week
The best of the worst M ship Applications

For the Week of October 13, 2002
edited by



Name: sarah

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
i am a witch.

[You and about half the internet community.]

i regularly put spells on my kids old shoes and clothes and send them to war zones to stop the fighting and rebuild the community so that the kids who wear them can live and play in safty and surrounded by people who love them like my kids do.

[Okaaaay. Well, I guess every little bit helps. I don't see the relevance in this eccentric behavior, though.]

i live in a very rural community and i set up a mother and toddler group to combat rural isolation for mothers and their kids. they said i couldn't do it. i said i can and i will.i

[When you set up a group to combat isolation, doesn't it solve the problem by its very nature?]

started it with my own toys. we now have over 30 mums from a 30 mile radius who drop in on a regular basis.my next project is to become the editor of our local netmums site. i am already training my daughters and my son to be heartless bitches and witches, we've read most of the

[Okay. You're doing a good job, but I've yet to see:
What you think Heartless Bitches are.
Why you think you're one.]

books on your kids reading recommendations. my son has already earned the respect of his classmates by standing up to the school bully.(he's only been there a month.) am i doin' a good job or what?

[I can't judge from over here based on this sketchy information.]

One Liner:
if you cannot find what you are looking for within yourself you will never find it without.

[You didn't say this, however. Why don't you quote who did?]



Name: Rei

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
im a heartless bitch because i just cant be fucked

[Chastity belt?]

putting up with shit other people give me. I constantly slap people who are hypocrites in issues like love, wont shut up about their bullshit whiny arsed opinions which they cant even support. I

[You think that you've supported your opinion by slapping someone?]

kicked a girl at my school because she was crying for attention. I've been to many counsellors for 'attitude problems' but hell, i didnt have an attitude problem, they had a perception

[You're well on the way to institutionalization. Congrats.]

problem. I automatically shudder when i go online and i see tryhards who put something stereotypical of the 'all girls are weak' myth (e.g. gansta for boys princess and angel for

[Here's where you have to wonder if the Ritalin kicked in.]

girls). My [deleted] nickname is - [ r e C k L e S s r e i ] - and my [other] nickname is [whiterabbit] from the movie The Matrix because Trinity is a kickass character,

[I see that you completely missed the symbolism of the white rabbit. Hint: It has nothing to do with kicking ass. Heartless Bitches note that you'd have been better off calling yourself "BlackVinyl" if you wanted to connect to Trinity.]

and my chinese starsign is the rabbit.

[For a minute, I thought you were going to list that you always eat "Trix" for breakfast.]

Most who know me think im a bitch, but really close friends know and can accept it. I do tae kwon do and work out regularly.

[Great. You're a loon who is IN shape.]

One Liner:
>>i can have [you] in the palm of my hand any time [i] want you<<

[You'd have to be a little more literate. You'd be surprised at all the hidden jokes and symbolic connections you'd get.]



Name: Rei

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I've already sent in an application. The above is not my email address.

[Then why did you give it to me?]

My actual emails are DUMBASS@hotmail.com and STUPID@yahoo.com. If you're not going to accept a bitch just because she's a high school student and doesnt have a non web-email address, then fuck that, remember my name, because you'll see me around.

[We only want the high school kids who:
-know they they are financially responsible for their internet usage.
-know they are ultimately responsible for what they do on their parents' account.
-figure out how to get what they need without whining about how unfair it is that you have to PAY for it.
Having their collective heads on straight is always a plus!]

One Liner:
i can have [you] in the palm of my hand any time [i] want you...

[I still don't get the brackets.]



Name: Little

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Just because I'm a stay at home Mom doesn't mean that I don't have a real job.

[Yes, it does. You mean that it doesn't mean that you don't work all day.]

You put your self into my shoes for one day and tell me who has it harder.

[Oh yeah, you have it rough. Let me see. Someone else provides you with food, clothing, rent, etc, etc. You do the same job as women who have a real job AND take care of kids. Please, don't come in here raging on about how hard you have it. You made a choice, true. I don't care if it's not popular with mainstream feminism because that's not really the issue. Women SHOULD be free to make any choices without criticism. Just don't convince me that you deserve credit for YOUR choice more than any OTHER woman.]

Can you cook dinner, wash cloths, change a diaper and help with homework at the same time? I think not.

[It doesn't really take much skill to do this, really. You sound like you need a little help with scheduling, organizing, and optimizing. Invest in a crock pot.]

Your job ends at 5:00 each day, mine ends in another 18 years or so.

[Please, sister. Some of us take our work home with us, and no, we don't get to retire any sooner than your 18 years. Most of us will have to invest 40 or 50 years in the work force.]

You get weekends off, I get to bath the dog, wash more cloths and make it to little league.

[We have to do this, too. In fact, even the women who DON'T have children may have to take care of elderly family members, or they may choose to volunteer. (You're not one to criticize anyone for CHOOSING their life, right?) You're not convincing me of your martyrdom.]

I chose this life, I chose to stay at home.

[Yes. Now stop griping about it.]

Just because I don't have some big high powered title to boost my ego

[You're not using "Mom" to boost your ego? I don't see why you have to demean what other women choose to do to make your own choice sound more noble.]

does not make you better than me. Don't look at me with pity and cluck your tongue at me, catch me on a bad day and I may just rip it out for you.

[Don't blame ME because you're a stay at home mom. (And what a violent example you set for the kids. Perhaps you DESERVE being looked down upon?]

Because I don't go into an office everyday does not give you the right to dump all of your stupid, petty assed problems on to me.

[What problems are they dumping on you? Do random women come and talk to you about their problems? Are these women your friends? Don't you think you SHOULD be listening to them if you want to kvetch about shitty diapers all day?]

I have enough shit with out yours.

[With those diapers, I'd say so.]

I'm not your damn shrink,

[You're not even my damn friend.]

but if you want to pay me $75 an hour I'll let you lay on my couch, I need a good laugh.

[I'd take a good laugh for free, but that's me. Still, you've been knocking those women who DO charge $75 an hour for their services, haven't you?]

So, before you tell me that I'm living in the 50's and giving women a bad name,

[No. I think that freedom for women means that some of them DO choose lifestyles that we may not like, or personally choose for ourselves. I don't feel that you speak for all stay at home mothers, much less all women. I think you're doing a smashing job of giving YOURSELF a bad name, however.]

think twice you may catch me when the dishwasher has broke and I might tell you something besides go fuck yourself.

[You mean that you're not washing dishes and clothes by hand?]

One Liner:
What makes you think that I really give a damn about your life?

[No. Someone who drones about their own life this much has no time to give a damn about another's.]



Name: poodiesnarf

[Sa da tay?]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I'm a heartless bitch because everybody pisses me off. Men top the list, of course.

[There's no "of course" here.]

They piss me off when they leave the toilet seat up.

[Oh, I thought you were going to go into equal pay for equal work, or maybe the deadbeat dad syndrome.]

Despite the fact that I've explained that I don't the f--cking cats drinking the water.

[I've never had a cat drink out of the toilet. Must be in the training...or the smell.]

It pisses me off that they pretend to be stupid so they don't have to accept any responsibility.

[And when they do, you complain while you do it FOR them, right?]

I say "pretend" because I cannot accept that ANYONE, male or female can be that stupid. Most of all it pisses me off that they are so selfish in bed that they think their orgasim is more

[Organism? Organ sim?]

important than the woman's...BULLS--T!

[How important do you think HIS is? That's the problem. Most people are out for themselves when it comes to sex.]

If they don't do it for me, and can't or wont take direction, you can bet they are going to find out what frustration really is!

[Not before YOU do, I'll warrant.]

Finally what is that "I'll call you" thing, and then they don't call?

[It's a way to get out of the kill zone in case you're crazy. If they tell you the truth, you might decide to hurt them if you can lay your hands on them.]

If they don't want to call...f--king say so. Believe me, it doesn't break our hearts, most of them are useless anyway.

[I wish that both sexes could be more honest in love matters. Truthfully, what signs have you given him that you want, require, and demand honesty? You're not even honest about your sexual needs.]

Plenty more where they came from. Nothing to get your panties in a twist about.

[Then why does it matter?]

You know even this web site pisses me off...What are all of these super hero chicks about.

[We think they rock.]

They are so politically incorrect.

[What did you expect from Heartless BITCHES?]

Where are the fatties?

[They are in disguise, Ms. Politically Correct.]

All you've got on this site are barbie doll skinny girls in their twenties

[Is that what you see? How do you know how old they are? I think that one that looks like Pam Grier looks about 35 to me.]

with no waist and big tits.

[What? No waist? They have waists. That's just silly.]

Very much what you expect to see in a teenage boy's room, hidden under his matress to masturbate with. You are perpetuating the very stereo types we struggle against.

[I think boys demand more skin, actually. I can see boys jacking off to Rosie the Riveter, too. You should really learn your feminist images. Secondly, WE aren't struggling against stereotype. We just refuse to fill them, and quite frequently, it's not a problem.]

Women don't look like that s--t. How's that for bitchy?

[No? Women DO look like this, actually. How's THAT for bitchy? Yours needs work.]

One Liner:
I'm not a bitch - I'm right!

[Neither is true.]



Name: Heather

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
i am a heartless bitch because i think why should i suffer when i do more than you.

[How do you know how much I do?]

And why do people always complain about why i buy expensive things its because i can and if i

[Is this what you mean by suffer?]

don'[t buy its because someone one bought it for me. i am not the girlfriend that u can call up and dry to cause lassie died again suck it up its a movie. and please if i have to hear another

[Aww. You don't shed a tear for Lassie? Not even Ol' Yeller? What about Bambi? Everybody cries for Bambi.]

storie about a guy and his chaeting i will barf , he has a dick what do u expect:?

[I expect us to refuse to confuse misbehavior with a gender quality. ANYone can cheat.]

i hate the those stories on the news about to jump of a bridge or something if he wanted to jump he would of done it all ready. i wouldn't be those people trying to talk hi out of it if u want attention i'll g9ive

[Bingo! Seriously, Hooked on Phonics, twit, have you tried it?]

it to... i would start screming what are u waiting for jump u pussy jump already

[Maybe he'll land on you!]

One Liner:
when your down always count on me to kick u again and push u further down

[Most aren't worth the effort.]



Name: Brandi

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:

[Empty as her skull.]

One Liner:
Men always do the same ol' shit, even though we try to tell them we're right.

[I can't even untwist all of these fallacies.]

Men never listen (as all of us heartless bitches know)

[I seldom have that problem. People tend to listen to me, by and large. I see it as its own punishment when you disregard wisdom.]

I put up with alot of shit, but I don't let it get me down.

[That WILL get you down. Why do you put up with it?]

I'm gonna take care of me and my daughters.....the most important things. Well these are my reasons. Thanks to you that listened:)

[You're welcome.]



Name: Raven

URL: no way you fucking fornicators

[This is no way to begin a relationship.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I'm a heartless bitch because I hate people who like flowers

[It's good to know that there's a method to your madness. I prefer to dislike people based on gaping character flaws.]

and I just want to blow up something.

[Start with your nose.]

I also hate all of those trashy women who read romance novels, because they need to get it through their thick skulls that no man is actually like that or that well hung. I don't like

[Watched a porno lately? Those dudes ARE that well hung.]

those mofos that think they are the best fucking people in the world- I'm the best, damnit,

[Ergo, you hate yourself.]

and they need to get that through their thick skulls.

[I wouldn't go around pointing fingers at thick skulls....]

I'm the mest.

[You're a mess, that's for certain.]

So eat that, all you pathetic hoes and losers out there. Bite my ass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Better for all involved to just kick it.]

One Liner:
I want to screw everyone into the fucking ground and then screw their parents (like on the discovery channel).

[What kind of cable do YOU get?]



Name: "crazycutter"

[His email addy sent up a red flag for me.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Sometimes I call old girlfriends cause I'm bored, then lead them on, then not call them for a couple of weeks.

[Didn't I date you before?]

...hehehe. I think of women as toys and nothing else.

[I guess it's fair. I mean, since they see your "model" penis, built to scale.]

I firmly believe that women cause injury to themselves through men.

[And you're a man of your convictions.]

I am not a women-hater,

[What do you call someone who just brags about causing them pain? I wonder what condition you left your toys in when you retired...waitaminnit...I just can't say that with a straight face. I'm sure that you still have a few around.]

I like women, I am straight, I just don't believe women serve an intelectual purpose.

[Agreed. Any who date you certainly do NOT have a brain in their head.]

If you do not permit male species

[You'd be banned because you're stupid, not because you're male.]

I'll just lie and be one anyone you stupid twat....:)

[You'd still be an ass.]

One Liner:
If I could do it all over, I wouldn't have given a rib.

[Adam? Is that you? Want an apple? Come on, you big, dumb lug, eat it.]



Name: marianne

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
reyddbfshfoIQH SWHroqwuroQIH IIEHGTOAIGOWGIHoig opujfoavjgPHBGO IKEOJGVEJGVOIRHGLH IHRGAORH

[You put the "ooh mau mau," baby, back into my smile, child.]

One Liner:
gikugtio

[Shamma lamma, Shamma lamma lamma ding dong.]







Copyright© Heartless Bitches International (heartless-bitches.com) 1999
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