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1999-2001
Weak of the Week
The best of the worst M ship Applications

For the Week of December 2, 2001
edited by JadeSyren





From the Pukefest files:

What makes me want to puke is people who look at me like I'm a sinner when I use Handicapped stalls, or elevators when there are stairs nearby.  I have a genetic nerve condition and there are days I can't even hold my own weight up, much less hike up 3 flights of stairs, just because I "look normal."  Also, anyone who asks why I take advantage of handicapped facilities.  Maybe because I'm disabled???

Get over it. I use the handicapped stalls each day (quickly, however, in case someone disabled wishes to use the stall). Some days I opt for the elevator instead of the stairs. If the fine on handicapped parking wasn't so steep, guess which spots I'd occupy when shopping for a couple of items. Stork spots are not safe from me, and pregnant women need the exercise anyway, quite frankly. [Besides, after all the arguing women did to be treated equally, it takes a lot of gall to demand preferential treatment along those lines. Pregnancy is not a handicap. Walk.]

Here's the bottom line, Bucky. No one cares who uses those items, and we certainly don't care if you take the elevator and not the stairs. Your handicap is making you self-conscious.



Email : silly_bee_happy@spray.se

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I donīt care if people around me gets sad just to pay attention, I care if i see my best friends get hurt! If you think itīs easy to be a bitch, just look at me! Iīm not sleepy... haha..

Whatever that has to do with it.

well... Í also say what ever I feal to say, people around me just have to deal with it ;)

I'm sure that sounds better in Swedish.

aah.. thatīs all folks... love from silly in sweden (with a bad english..)

It's not the English that's bad, Silly.

One Liner:
bzzz.. what?!?... bzzz... hello?!?! scrapztzz... I cant hear ya... wxuubln.. I gotta hang up now!!! khgbxkwhb... bye!!

Faking a bad connection isn't Heartless.



Email : I taut I taw a Puddetatt@bellsouth.net

UserID : Michael

No, not another boyfriend ID.

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
 Because I like to be mean and cruel to people and make them cry....it makes me feel great and better about myself  

Wow. It must suck to be you, huh?

One Liner:
I take no blame for my actions because I do NO wrong.

It helps when you live in a state of denial.



Email : looking for trouble@ctcn.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Men are like dogs- eventually one will come sniffing around. But keep in mind full breeds are usually stupid.

So what's a half-breed man? What are you talking about? How does this apply?

I have a job, and my own house, and a car. Whatever I can't do myself I can pay to have it done- what do I need you for?

SOMEone is doing it, aren't they?

My opening line is usually "I am divorced and I have four kids. Are you scared yet?"

My question is when did you learn to stop having them?

One Liner:
Overhearing a man call me Bitch, I corrected him. I said "It's Redheaded Bitch, get it right."

As if what color comes from that little box of hair dye matters in the least.



Email : mdmedelirious@stories.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Well, look at the name for one thing. Yeah, people say that I am vile and bitter, and I suppose I am. Most women have fantasies of fucking their boyfriends...I have orgasmic fantasies of ruthlessly murdering my ex boyfriends.

Karla Faye Tucker, I thought you were dead.

I'm also a hell of a lot smarter than most fatuous women,

It's kind of hard NOT to be. It's like saying I'm smarter than a bag of hammers.

and basically hate men in general for being such pricks. I never bother with guys, much less listen what they have to say. I just like to tempt 'em, reel 'em in, and spit 'em out in revenge for the pain that they have caused me.

Doesn't keep you from talking about them.

I like punk-chick-rock and have an obsession for Poe and Sylvia Plath. I'm an avid writer, and avid knitter, actress, and singer.

Snore. Run, run as fast as you can, I can't tell you apart from the other cookie-cutter Goths.

One Liner:
Just call me Miss Ann. Miss Ann Thrope

The one thing you don't have to worry about is me calling you.



Email : lyin lips@a0l.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Well, I knew this was the site for me and I want to become a member and get more bitchier.

Still don't understand the rule about comparatives, do you?

I was scrubbing the kitchen floor a few weeks ago while my husband was fucking me up the ass

Aiyiyi! Way too much information. Crikey!

when I realized that I didn't have to put up with his shit and hit him in the head with the metal slop bucket.

How did you keep from falling face first onto the floor?

Thankfully, I got to the gun first

Gun? Where did I miss the gun?

and he only hit me once before I shot him in the thigh. He'll have problems fucking anything up the ass now!!!!!!! ;)

You couldn't just tell him that you weren't into anal sex?

I would love to work on this website (do you get paid for this) and

Surprise! You got your wish in a most unexpected way.

become a full time member. Everyone in Assfuck County thinks I'm a right bitch for shootin' him like that but they like to clean the floor and I don't.

Who cleaned up all that blood? Talk about making more work for yourself. No, I DON'T believe that a woman who gets longdicked in the ass against her wishes would ask her wounded husband to clean up his own blood.

The bucket knocked out his front teeth and now he only has ten left so he wants me to pay for dentures but I wont unless he pulls the rest out on his own. Fuckin idiot.

Amazing. His teeth match your conglomerate I.Q. Sweet.

I only have five minutes of information superhighway time left and I want to spend it with other heartless bitches. Damn libary is closing.

Get a job.

One Liner:
I need more bullets... you're still breathing.

Stop wasting what you've got. If you were a better shot, you'd only need one.



Email : spunkmonkey@spunkmail.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I don't give jack shit about what anyone says and end up insulting out of their fuckin mind.

You must be the resident expert in "out of their fucking mind."

One Liner:
Rude abnoxis

Just like your spelling. Lord.

and bichy

Oh Bichy you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind. Hey Bicky! *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* Hey Bicky! *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* (Is the song stuck in your head, too?)



Email : crackrockcity@widomaker.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Well, basically, if I see any hoez sleepin' wit my man I go crazy on 'em. Once I put poo in her food.

Where'd you get it? There you are, working in some dive, when your man strolls in with his new pussy. What do you do? You (I hope anyway) don't keep a trusty can of shit in the kitchen for just this occasion. You either have to roam the streets and look for a fresh steamer (and lose pay) or you have to go pinch out a fresh one, and that means sticking your hands in your own feces for a futile revenge against the wrong party.

She threw up but it didn't matter cuz she wuz a bulimic but my man

YOUR man? Wasn't he with someone else? "If that's your boyfriend, he wasn't last night..." Michelle Ndege Ochello.

thought it was icky that she had eat shit and he said he didn't want 2 fuck her no more. Then we went ahead and fucked all nite.

You don't mind sloppy, stinky, seconds, I guess.

I like to get men drunk-its real funny. Once when my boy was sleepin wit a hangover I put nair in his shampoo.

You get them drunk, then punish them for doing it?

The next time he washed his hair, his hair fell out and he was balled

Nah. Too easy.

like a babIES a$$. I am 4 real.

I only WISH Nair worked as advertised.

I like to keep it real, ya'll. I'm real smart cuz I got a 1300 on my SATs. I'm a sofmore. LOTSa people say that smart people are bitches, but dat's kewl cuz I M D BITCH! YEAH, BOYO! THIS SHITAZZ ROX!

Ever chart the occurrence of intelligence in the insane? It's a real eye opener.

One Liner:
PEACE, LOVE, AND POO. I HOPE U PUKE ALL O VER YER SELF.

That's not really a rare occurrence.



Email : clown fucker@sac.k12.ia.us

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
my boyfriend says I'm an unbelievable bitch because i had sex with a dirty clown.

Sounds to me like you just broke up. You didn't need to fuck dirty clowns anyway. Make 'em wash first.

One Liner:
BOYS SUCK

If they are smart, and you are lucky.



Email : weird@att.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I have goals, serious goals, so fuck any man that is going to get the way of me accomplishing my goals.

Which, ironically, is just what she did.

If a man can't understand that in my world that I am number one and that he can only be number 2, he needs a reality check.

Your account is severely overdrawn.

One Liner:
If God meant for a man's dick to be sucked, why didn't he make men with flexible spines?

You mean like those straws that bend? I don't see how this is an indication of God's ban on oral sex.



Email : Mstress@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I run my life on my terms. For example, my husband exists strictly for my use and entertainment. He is not involved in any decision about what I do or what he is told to do.

You say that as if this wasn't a sex game you two play. Tell me who you are outside your twat.

One Liner:
Why would I want to know what you think.

Minds tend to stagnate alone.

And the AOL Profile. You've already guessed the content.

Member Name: MsTress -Dominant- into BDSM since I was 16
Location: She's a Joisey Gal, and the only thing cool so far
Sex: Female
Marital Status: MWF considering female subs
Hobbies: Obedience training, conditioning. Obedience should be a reflex, not a choice.My husband is my a 24/7 slave. Not accepting applications from males.
Computers: I do not type quickly or spell accurately. That's what secretaries do.

Certainly you don't have a secretary to fill out your online applications.

Occupation: Corporate Goddess by day (Wall Street), Mistress of my domain by night. Since it seems you must know, 5' 10",157#, blk hr blu ey

Did any of you ask her what she looked like?

Personal Quote: Why would I care to know what YOU want?

If you wanted to boost your Domme rating, you've got the wrong Heartless-Bitches.com.



Email : candidarling@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
My bestfriend and I take turns faking diabetes attacks to get seated faster at resturants & I told off the class bitch.

It's just plain bad karma to fake an illness as serious as this. God don't like ugly.

One Liner:
"NO" always works.. 'wanna hang out?' "NO"

No works until people fake disease to get their way.



Email : DeBOREah@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
of the fact that men seem intimidated by me.

Noticed that look of fear, did you?

I have realized just lately that this stems largely from the fact that my judgment, opinions, strengths, talents, instincts, wisdom and capabilities just naturally seem to outweigh theirs, with theirs seeming almost puny in comparison.

Only in length. How can someone say so little with so much?

One Liner:
Men tell me sometimes that my dick is bigger than theirs , so then sometimes I tell them to suck it!

You suck, no doubt about that.

My Own Rant by DeBOREah (a hopeful for membership):

This was rejected by the SupremeBitch's stupidity filter, but it overloaded when she submitted this junk again.

One of my many Rants

Them's fightin' words.

to be addressed throughout my anticipated membership with you is described as follows:

I don't know many women very well or very long as they usually and quickly begin to hate my guts and plan my demise, though never showing anything other than a lapdog friendliness, adoration and accomodation towards me.

You should cherish those few. It's obvious why most people dislike you.

Naturally such fawning by these dim, shallow, negative, uneducated desperate women also brought disgust to me.

Naturally, but you cultivated this anyway, didn't you?

Yet my natural instincts and loyalty to the forces of Nature,

I thought it was the "Powers of Grayskull." You're a one-woman Nature Squad.

through which gifts received by them had allowed me access to a wealth of natural and personal resources, demanded that I give of myself and said blessings onto others more unfortunate than I and in need.

What arrogance to think that anyone needs you in this way. Are you getting the picture as to why you're frequently sans friends? Who is demanding that you do this? Nature? God? She-Ra? Elvis? McCloud?

In so doing, I was required to accept these disturbing and unpleasant women into my friendship and to listen to them and their neverending complaints, rumours, nasty gossip and ill informed views of life and to smile at their nonsense.

You're false through and through. I'm not really clear on who is requiring this of you? Your toaster?

Afterwards, I shared with them the secrets I had been given as a reward for countless days' worship and gratitude. Along with my own secrets, inspirations, ideas and dreams, these women were shown how to raise their lowly esteem, nurture their lack of confidence and to comfort and soothe their pains, rejection and heartaches. Allowing them then to develop a desire to better themselves, their love, homes and their families.

You actually think that you controlled them? You can't make friends unless you feel superior?

Such transformations were surprisingly swift, causing delight among us all. But then just as soon such women began exhibiting signs of over indulgence in their barely acquired gifts and mistaken attributes.

Meaning that they saw through your condescending bullshit and general falseness and left? Maybe you finally saw them clearly, you know, without the haze of your illness marring your perception? I doubt it.

Soon afterthen, I would find myself greeted by these same women with distinct haughtiness and disdain by each one by one of my sisterhood.

Sounds like a personality disorder you're cultivating.

Startled by their actions, I wondered "surely these newcomers to the knowledge can not yet believe themselves to be as powerful and gifted as I, a long standing and loyal Woman of the Wildness?

Nah. They just realized that you were crazy. I'm beginning to think that crazy is an understatement. It's like saying that the sun is hot.

Yet why do they show such disregard?

Because you need more help than you can get from your Nature buddies (tell Woodsy I said, "Hi."), Oz, or even your blender.

Might they believe that every encouraging complement voiced in their vague direction were so true?

Not only crazy but dishonest, too.

No! But then why are they now surveying my treasures and home so expectantly? And why dare they enter my land seeking counsel with my Mate and then leave without even the ask of my welfare?

Some women run with the wolves. Yours just ate your homework.

And then why, as I approach do they pretend to have a reason for gaiety and cryptic queries regarding my plans for the future? Have they forgotten the lessons? Do they not remember the teacher? Only the promised rewards? Have they forgotten the duties and rituals that must be accomplished beforehand? And How Dare they forget to Remember the Beginning?

But first, you must Disinfect and Floss the Middle because it is OF THE EARTH, and the EARTH is GOOD, GOOD EARTH. I must Remember to Forget this Application.

Such atrocities are they. The negative forces which I unleashed must have not gone far before returning to them and must now be even more powerful within. Even allowing them to imagine my demise and their inheritance of my throne!" Indeed, such answer was the only possible!

Oh yeah, you are really cuckoo. Did you know that?

Well then, such actions I knew and laughingly envisioned would only bring them to ruin, though much more intense than the one from which they had just arose. Such neglect and indifference towards the very Forces who had graced them, would bring only disaster in it's wake. Far be it from me to deny them their justice.

"Waging a War that's all IN YOUR HEAD." Next on a very special Oprah.

So again, and once more, I raised no eye nor lost a smile in their presence. Watching the King

Elvis (and your mind) have left the building, and I am not surprised that you're seeing him.

always for an alert of his actions. As long as I lay still and quietly ignored the obvious, I was safe from his scornful reproach. Fighting the hardest though were the lips of mine which would ask, then despair the asking of a simple question. That of the reason behind these women's certainty that they themselves now qualified for competing for my throne beside His.

This is about women poaching your man? Sounds like you're no longer the reigning queen. Dressing it up in this insanity doesn't change the fact that you're a suspicious woman in a dying relationship.

They have no doubt witnessed my fairness and beauty which are rewards of dancing with goodness.

Insanity and lunacy are rewards of dancing with goofiness.

Then why Have not they looked at thier own selves in the looking glass? And after all, my true life long friends

What friends? You said that you didn't have any.

are truly as or more beautiful as I, and none of us REALLY care that we do not have any short, fat, ugly girlfriends.

This attitude is why they left. They were ashamed to be seen with you.



Email : adrian@joke.boo

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
Cut the crap and let me in !

Letting you in would INCREASE the crap.

By pressing the SUBMIT button, you agree to allow the contents of this form to be posted to this web site. Unless it is revealed by you within your "I'm a Heartless Bitch because..." statements, Heartless Bitches International will not use your Age, Gender, Country or Last Name from this form, on the site without your express permission.

We already know what we said; we put it there.

One Liner:
Long Vehicle

What is "what does a man with small dick buy?"



Name: NETNETNET

Email : NETNET@NETNET.NET

UserID : NETNET

URL : NET.NET/NET

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET

NET NET NET NET NET

NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET

NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET

NET NET NET NET NET

This goes on for about 12 pages.

One Liner:
NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET NET

What is "what they use to catch him when he's on the loose?"



Email : not the real@pivot.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
There is no such thing as a heartless bitch. Everyone has to kiss someone's ass on a daily basis in order to survive.

Maybe that's true in YOUR line of work.

I wish I'd been born a sea otter.

Me, too. Then you couldn't talk.

One Liner:
If you don't make me a member I'll have your fucking guts.

No. No. You'll grind my bones to make your bread.





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