Latest: May 12, 2002

Previous 'Issues':

2002
December 23, 2001
December 16, 2001
December 9, 2001
December 2, 2001
November 25, 2001
November 18, 2001
November 11, 2001
November 4, 2001
October 28, 2001
October 21, 2001
October 14, 2001
October 7, 2001
September 30, 2001
September 23, 2001
September 16, 2001
September 9, 2001
August 19, 2001
August 12, 2001
August 5, 2001
July 29, 2001
July 22, 2001
July 15, 2001
July 8, 2001
July 1, 2001
June 24, 2001
June 17, 2001
June 10, 2001
June 3, 2001
May 27, 2001
May 20, 2001
May 13, 2001
May 6, 2001
April 29, 2001
April 22, 2001
April 15, 2001
April 4, 2001
March 31, 2001
March 25, 2001
March 18, 2001
March 11, 2001
March 4, 2001
February 25, 2001
February 18, 2001
February 11, 2001
February 4, 2001
January 28, 2001
January 22, 2001
January 12, 2001
January 7, 2001
January 5, 2001
December 30, 2001
December 23, 2000
December 10, 2000
December 3, 2000
November 26, 2000
November 19, 2000
November 12, 2000
November 5, 2000
October 29, 2000
October 22, 2000
October 15, 2000
October 8, 2000
October 1, 2000
September 24, 2000
September 17, 2000
September 9, 2000
September 2, 2000
August 27, 2000
August 20, 2000
August 12, 2000
August 6, 2000
July 30, 2000
July 23, 2000
July 16, 2000
July 10, 2000
June 24, 2000
June 19, 2000
May 28/June 12, 2000
May 22, 2000
May 15, 2000
May 7, 2000
May 1, 2000
April 24, 2000
April 17, 2000
April 10, 2000
April 2, 2000
March 20, 2000
March 6, 2000
February 20, 2000
February 13, 2000
January 30, 2000
January 16, 2000
January 2, 2000
December 13, 1999
December 5, 1999
November 28, 1999
November 21, 1999
November 14, 1999
November 7, 1999
Aug 24, 1999
June 1, 1999
May 24, 1999
May 17, 1999
Weak of the Week
The best of the worst Membership Applications

For the Week of December 5th
edited by JadeSyren



Email : OhwhattaHo@webtv.net

[Please note that Ho was a part of her e-mail address.]

UserID : danger

[You said it, Will Robinson.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
"This isn't Burger King! You get it MY way, or you don't get the damn thing"

[But you're a Ho. You're never going to get return business with this attitude.]

One Liner:
I know what Kegel exercises are for.

[That would be a requirement in your line of work.]



Name: boob

Email : onlyat@aol.com

UserID : sucitup

[The wit! Stop, I'm peeing my pants over here.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:

[Boob's goal was to be a laughingstock this week. I obliged him. It was the only way anyone would laugh at his material. Whattya say, Boob. Better than us laughing at your equipment, eh?]

if i found you bleeding and dying at a plane crash site,id loot your wallet first then step on your throat

[As if you didn't need a map and both hands just to find your ass.]

One Liner:
my wifes boobs are like charmin everyone gets to squeeze them

[Consider it her way of selecting your replacement. It's obvious that decision-making is not her strong point.]



Email : cluelesstwit@cow.net

UserID : Donkey

[Appropriate.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I am an utter cow!!!!

[No, you're an utter dolt. Cows are brighter. Most everything I could name would have to be brighter.]

When ever I'm told I'm a soppy loser- it means the person who made the statement will soon have a stick up their *?*!.

[Eyes? Nose? Isn't that supposed to be a face? Aren't you alluding to an ass here? You have to do better than vague, lame threats.]

My fave. phrase is- Shit's good for gardens, why don't you lie down in one?

[Is this just going to be a series of unconnected, incoherent thoughts?]

I hate tuna, and anyone who eats it near me will be sure to have an orange segmant down their trousers!

[I guess that answers my question.]

Am I a heartless bitch?

[No.]

One Liner:
Shits good for gardens- why don't you go lie down in one!

[This wasn't funny enough to repeat.]



Email : laughatme@gte.net

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I am sick of men who want mommy's

[Mommy's what?]

instead of a girlfriend.

[Stop breastfeeding them.]

Im sick of men thinking that you have all the answer the worlds questions right in your chest!

[When it's obvious that you don't think, not even with your tits. I'm sick of you twits submitting ridiculous applications.]

One Liner:
I don't feel sorry for any women who lets themselves be and emotional anchor for men.

[Me neither. I don't even have pity for those unable to express that sentiment.]



Email : phonybaloney@aol.com

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:

[Behold the duplicity. Part one: The Decent Application.]

I can't stand people who complain about the things that go wrong and don't do a damned thing to help themselves. I hate the completely moronic girls who mess around with or sleep with men, simply because their best friend is doing it with his friend. I will defend myself when attacked and I refuse to allow people to walk over me. I am not a welcome mat. Regarding men, I say who, I say when, I say where. Also, I do not hate men. I hate stupid men and the same applies to stupid women.

One Liner:
If all you can think of to do is whine to me you are beyond all help.

[Part two: AOL profile.]

Member Name: [Her name and location]. And I just found out I'm a heartless b*tch
Location: The Waste Hole ~^~ also known as [location], but I'm a non-conformist...W.M.J.O.'s all the way

[Way to non-conform]

Birthdate: 5/10/83...Taurus
Sex: Female
Marital Status: Nope I like to mess around
Hobbies: Hangin out, chillen, nothin much. ^ He hit me and it felt like a kiss, he hit me and I knew he loved me, cuz if he didn't care for me, I could have never made him mad.
Computers: Vapid wh*re! ^ Seize the moment cuz tomorrow u might be dead. ^ I never met a guy who claimed to be cherry flavored
Occupation: Junior at tha tore up lookin school ~^~ I thought of you as everything I had and I couldn't keep.
Personal Quote: Don't talk to my breasts. U won't be meeting either of them. ^ Is there anything u wanna do to me? Anything at all???

[Commit you comes to mind. Correct you is another possibility.]



Name: superbitch

[Remains to be seen]

Email : choke@aol.com

UserID : pbitch

[Love the Mnemonics.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
i am a bitch because i hate puppy-dog men who let me use them like meat. i tell these pansies what too do and they worship me like a goddess. i hate stupiid people and do not like people to cry abut there problems to me. men can go to hell! women have the real power!

[Ah yes. How could I have ever doubted you?]

One Liner:
I'm only a bitch because of people like you!

[Bzzzt! Wrong. Bitches love to claim responsibility for their lives. Back to obedience school with you.]



Email : stupid-o@webtv.net

UserID : bitch25

[Age or IQ? You be the judge.]

Reasons for being a Heartless Bitch:
I am a heartless bitch for many reasons.First of all,I have Crohn's Disease(ibd)and I think I got dealt a pretty shitty blow.

[Great pun!]

I hate a doctor,male or female,who says that women are whiners.

[You're setting a fine example.]

Let's see there ass tolerate the shit we do.

[Don't lump me in to your women suffering ideal. I don't make it a point of pride to tolerate shit. There's not much pride in giving it either. I'd have to say that shit-handling is a shameful business all around.]

Secondly,don't tell me about your pms,it's a fact of life,get over it!Don't

[Whose facts? Whose life? I don't get PMS. What was that funny point you made about not whining about illness?]

bitch and whine at me because your man doesn't understand,you better go take a class on female anatomy and figure it out for yourself.

[Oh no, you're too busy moping and brooding over your Crohn's Disease that there's precious little time for anything else.]

Last,but not least,don't dare let me hear a woman say"This is to hard for me,I need a man to do this."If I hear you say that I'm going to tell you this"You need to learn how to depend on yourself,and get off your lazy ass and put those fucking limp muscles to work.They weren't put there just to hang around."

[Don't dare let you hear it? What would you do? Bore her to death by holding yourself up as a paragon of virtue because you suffer in silence? Oh, anything but that.]

I think this should be enough said.

[I think you should have stopped before you started.]

One Liner:
Get a grip,get over it,whatever you need to do but wallow in your own shit,

[Because you do enough of that for everyone.]

I have a life.

[So do paramecia. Only they can't talk.]



Copyright© Heartless Bitches International (heartless-bitches.com) 1999

Send this page to someone who needs to read it.
go to top

Pause your cursor over each link below for a more detailed description

Home
Search HBI
HBI FAQ
   Rants
   Collected Quotes
   The Manipulator Files
   Nice Guys? BLEAH
   Links
    I'M NOT BITTER...
   Auntie Dote
   Honorary HBs
   Adult Books
   Kids Books
   Privacy Policy
   Awards
   HBI Sitings

---

Want to link to HBI?



  Want to know when we update? Subscribe to our "What's New" RSS Feed

(What is an RSS Feed?)


Get SharpReader - our favorite RSS aggregator - it's free!

If you don't have a Newsreader, you can subscribe to updates via email:

Enter your Email


Powered by FeedBlitz

Add this Content to Your Site