Viv
I am happy to be the person that I am, and I am leading a wonderful,
wise life. I pursue my dreams and desires by means of intelligence and
creativity. I am thankful to myself and the Heartless Bitches I have
learned (and am still learning) from, for I used to be more Princess
than Heartless Bitch. I was a stubborn princess, book-smart yet a
complete pansy when it came to running my own life. Change took a very
long time, but it was inevitable. I was getting walked on, and I
deserved it for being too nice to everyone except myself. I was sick of
that kind of destructive dynamic in my personal and professional
relationships. I mustered all my determination to work through my fears
and risk losing relationships with people I love so that I can make *my*
life more productive and easier for a change. It might have taken me
years beyond the legal adult age to finally grow up emotionally and
intellectually, but guess what? I did it, and today I am happy and
content with my Heartless Bitchiness.
Here are a few of my favorite Heartless Bitch qualities, since they
involved areas that I most needed to work on.
1. Help yourself! Martyrdom is not exactly the most positive way to deal
with a situation or help someone. No, I don't care how many churches say
it's one of the best things ever. Think about it--how much good do you
think you're really doing if your sense of self and perhaps even your
body is suffering? In many situations, you don't have to sacrifice much
(if any) in order to resolve an issue, so...don't.
2. If you do choose to do something that goes against your desires, for
whatever valid reason, stop whining about the situation and how unfair
it is and how it is sooo not what you wanted, etc. It was your choice.
If you made that decision because you thought that it would give you
what you want in the long run despite failing to satisfy your immediate
wants, then what the heck are you complaining about? Shut up.
3. For every minute you whine about all the many, many things you have
to do, you are losing 1 minute of actually getting those things done.
So, again, do humankind a favor and shut up. If you have nothing to show
for how busy you are except for talking about how busy you are, no one
cares anyway.
4. People change. As a consequence, relationships between people change.
If these relationships change for the worst, they have to go. Not
everyone believes in conflict resolution. Some people will not work
things out if it means not getting their way at all times. Sometimes the
situation can get so detrimental that ties have to be severed even
though that process can get mighty complicated. My case is a bit
simpler. I let people walk all over me for years and when I started
saying "No," "I don't agree with you," and "I think that's stupid,"
guess what happened. Goodbye!
5. You can have favorite celebrities and express sufficient appreciation
of their talents without losing the rest of your life to groupie-dom.
This all boils down to one simple question: Who needs more of your
attention, them or you/your family/your life/your insert-pet-here?
6. It takes a smarter person to clearly state an opinion using plain
language rather than having to say "fuck," "shit," and various
derogatory terms 4 times in a sentence.
7. Listen to both your heart and your mind. Those two parts work
differently and should both be respected and honored. Your heart will
point you toward the direction of what you want, and your brain will
show you how to get there wisely (providing that you use it). Without
either, you will die, literally and in every other sense.
8. Maintain balance. I believe true Heartless Bitches take care to have
balanced priorities in life. Work hard and have fun. Think critically
and have a sense of humor. Have great friends and quality time by
yourself. Be equally considerate of others' well-being and yours. Be
proud of who you are and find ways to make yourself even better.
Acknowledge your emotions and act upon them in a rational manner. Take
helpful advice into consideration and ignore stupid advice.
Yes! I want to read more from Real Life Heartless Bitches
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