Gabrielle
I don't know about "heartless". Is it heartless when you don't have the heart
to coddle someone to make them feel better? Is it heartless when you tell them
to break the fuck up with that loser they're dating, even though they "love
them so much", when you know the relationship is emotionally bad for them? Is
it heartless to tell your friends to shut the fuck up and fix their damned
problems when they come to you with their self-pity? Jesus Christ, if I didn't
care about them, I'd just patronize them.
Nah, I know most people don't see it. I'm just glad most of my friends don't
care. Though I've got one, a closet gay, who never asks me for my opinion
anymore because it's always "Baby, you're an emotional leech. Get therapy."
Oh, and THERE'S a wonderful issue there. Get this.... he hates women, which is
one of the reasons he's gay. (I realize not all gay men hate women, but this
one does). He hates just about everything about them. But he doesn't hate me
because, quote, "He doesn't think of me as a woman". ExCUSE me? I'm actually
only mildly offended by that, but christ, what does he think? That god stamped
us all out with a cookie cutter? And his reasons for saying such a thing? I'm
not "shallow". I don't flirt. My concern isn't just with my appearance. I
don't hang all over boys. I'm not "catty". (If he believes this, he hasn't been
listening to me.) I tried to convince him that he just hates the stereotype
society has put on women, but then the truth came out: He hates women because
they take all the decent men.
Uh-huh. Riiiiiiight.
Hell, I'll be honest. I've got a decent man and I love him to death. He loves
me, but he doesn't worship me, he always thinks I'm beautiful but he doesn't
think looks are everything, he respects what I say and he disagrees with me. He
supports me, I support him, and it's a kick ass relationship.
But men frustrate the hell out of me sometimes. Their expectations, their
stereotypes, the defensive bullshit they put up whenever somebody challenges
their cozy self-image. If they want to be the big bad protectors of us innocent
little women, why don't they grow UP? How the fuck are we supposed to depend on
them (this is assuming that we wanted to) if they're not dependable? GAH!
Double-standard.
This seems to be becoming a rant, which isn't the point. The point is that I'm
a Heartless Bitch because I refuse to adhere to a double standard. I refuse to
be hypocrite. And when I see that in others, I refuse to just let them quietly
get away with it while they're trying to be something dishonest. I respect
myself, and I respect somebody with the guts to tell me straight up what they
think. 'Cause of that, I don't particularly care if I get chunked in the "weak
of the week" section. Christ, at least you were honest. And at least you
judged me based on something other than my sex and the way I dress, which I'm so
incredibly sick of I'm not even going to go into it now. (I'm saving it for the
Rants section) I'm honestly applying for membership here because I saw something
I just don't see a lot of other places: Girls willing to just tell the world to
fuck off and let them be who they are. I live in The South.... I don't find
that a lot around here. And I find a lot of men who are SERIOUSLY intimidated
by me when I confess that every once in a while, I like to kick a little ass.
Well, I'm sorry for not being a perfect plastic Southern Belle. It's like Sir
Mixalot said... silicone parts are made for toys, babe. And I'm a human being.
Thanks so much for noticing.
Yes! I want to read more from Real Life Heartless Bitches
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