I work as a short order cook in a restaurant and one of the first things new employees are told is NEVER to make me angry.

I get along with all the other assholes at work.

I think Dennis Leary is funny.

I don't think Cathy Guisewite is funny.

I subsist on cornflakes, coffee and cigarettes.

My friends call me Queen Bitch.

I've been described as shark-like.

Messing with the heads of stupid people is my favourite pastime.

I study corporate law.

I drink gin.

Yes! I want to read more from Real Life Heartless Bitches

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