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Exemplary Heartless Bitches


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Virna

I am a Heartless Bitch because I am SO done. Done with the Dumb shit, done with the bullshit, done with the lies, the manipulation, and the entire rigmarole of what my parents, my supervisors, and society in general expects of women. I have been a daughter, a wife, a stepmother and a mother and I FINALLY wised up and realized that no one else was ever going to be able to make me happy. I had to do that for myself. Furthermore, I wasn't likely to ever get happy if I was constantly trying to play by someone else's set of rules. It took 10 years of a bad marriage, countless bad relationships (all with virtually the same guy) and the saving grace of therapy for me to finally *get it* and now that I have it, I'm not about to turn back.

I feel like all the things that happened to me, happened to someone else, because I have changed so drastically since then. I couldn't be more grateful for that change either. I can finally see clearly! It's as if suddenly I can see reality! And I don't mind telling you, it's both alarmingly depressing and alarmingly rejuvenating. I now know that I am the only one that can change things for me, that I'm the only one I have to please and that, unfortunately, that the world in which we live, doesn't like change...and effects it even slower. In the last few years, I have been heartily dismayed to find that there are still countless instances of gender discrimination on a daily basis. That's the dismaying part. The rejuvenating part is that I don't have to accept it. This is me, this is my life and I am not about to sacrifice it for someone else's comfort. I am a happy person now.

My mother constantly advises about the security benefits of marriage, and I laugh and point out that she's on her 4th and I've not heard her say one positive thing about it in the last 10 years.

My father claims that I am not being a good mother when I send my son to a sitter for a night spent out dancing (or some other non-parental event) and I remind him that I am home with my son every night, and most weekends as well and since I pay my own rent and all my other costs of living, I'll do as I please, thank you very much. I would never leave my son with someone I didn't trust, he's in no danger, and it only happens approx. 3 times a year anyway. I appreciate their concern, but since they don't have to clean up after me, I'd just as soon they not tell me how to make the mess.

I'm a plus-sized woman, a single working mom, and an independent woman and amazingly enough (to the idiots of the world), I don't have any trouble getting dates, either. Naturally, they aren't all date-worthy, but that's nothing different than any other women in the world have to deal with.

I am constantly amazed at the lack of intelligence in the general Population, and it frightens me. The amount of lies people tell themselves to justify either their relationships, their behaviors, or their current SO's. The range of disrespect people will tolerate simply to say "my boyfriend" or "my girlfriend." Frankly, it just makes me feel better about myself, and I think that's a heartless thing to say. Some of these people are my friends, who normally have excellent brain activity but for some reason, lose all sensibility when it comes to someone who makes them cum. As a friend, I tell them what I think, but offer to support their decision regardless. Then I go home and remind myself how lucky I am that it's MY house, with MY stuff in it and I don't have to tolerate anything I don't want to. Even in a relationship, which I am currently in, I don't have to make any excuses. I love that, and I love my new life, and I think that is the essence of what your site is about... Making your own choices, your own rules, and your own happiness.

Yes! I want to read more from Real Life Heartless Bitches

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