I am a bitch because I have to be (and okay, I admit that I like it too). I look deceivingly sweet and innocent so people are constantly trying to take advantage of me. I quickly set them straight. I am a bitch because I refuse to fake an orgasm. If a man can't give me pleasure I'll be damned if I lay there moaning like a moron to salvage his delicate ego. If he doesn't know that he's doing something wrong how will he ever learn how to do it right? A moan from me is 100% genuine, and if he can't get it right by the third or fourth time my patience runs out and his ass gets kicked to the curb. Please, I urge all men to find the clitoris! If you don't know where it is ask. Last but not least, I consider myself to be a bitch because although I am not a man hater, I recognize men as being the frustrating creatures they are. However, their inadequacies are not my problem. The moment a man starts throwing temper tantrums like a two-year-old child and/or mistakes me for his mother, I escort him to the door and encourage him to use it.

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