Mallika
I know what my strengths are and I won't let other people walk on me like I
was nothing more than a foot rag. At the same time, I know I have flaws and
therefore don't act like Prissy Princess Perfection who has her head up her own
damn ass. I am upfront about mistakes and will never be reluctant to apologize.
I don't like confrontations, but I won't shrink from them either. In the
workplace, I refuse to hike up my skirt, kiss someone's ass, or deep-throat
someone's dick to get ahead. I have more self-respect and more talent than to
jump into the mud and play those kinds of games.
I don't swoon over a man because he has a pretty face. I'm not the kind of
person who would ever let the following sentences (said by a former friend) pass
my own lips: "I know he's a jerk, but he's so damn cute that it hardly matters.
I want to have, like, ten of his babies!" It isn't the part about wanting to
carry a handsome man's children that pisses me off. What frustrates me in the
extreme is the way some people prioritise physical beauty over everything else
(like a person's ability to treat others with respect), and then later on
complain that Life/Fate/God/Choose-Your-Own-Scapegoat always deals them the most
rotten luck when it comes to love. Sometimes you don't have to look very far to
see with whom the responsibility lies.
I choose to write my own life script, placing in it what I feel is right
for me. I will gladly listen to criticism and advice (sometimes it's
"begrudgingly listen," because I'm not perfect), but the choice to act still
lies with me. I won't follow others' ideals just to conform or to avoid
pressure. At the end of the day, I'm the one who has to deal with whether or not
I'm happy. I feel that trying to absolve oneself from one's own responsibility
by saying "I'm miserable because THEY told me I should/shouldn't do
such-and-such and I was only following their advice" is bullshit. You're in
charge of your own destiny and happiness. Changing yourself to accommodate other
people's expectations or ideals means losing sight of who you really are and
becoming damn unhappy in the process. I believe there is no "one right path" for
everyone and that each person has his or her own road to travel. Know thyself --
and then act accordingly.
I chose to be childfree, despite being pressured to conform to what society
expects of me. Through helping to raise my sister (who is fourteen years younger
than I am), I realized that the calling of motherhood was not meant for me.
Although other people may feel that their family isn't complete without a child,
that isn't personally true for my husband and me. To us, we ARE a family even
though our family consists of two humans and a feline. And no, I don't hate
children and I don't mind one way or another if other people have children. I
am, however, sick of people who patronizingly tell me that I'll change my mind
or that I'll want a baby because I won't be able to control my hormones. (I
guess carefully thinking things through doesn't mean squat, and having a
functioning mind with reasoning capabilities is just for show these days.)
What really gets me twitching with rage is when people feel that my
lifestyle choice is an attack on their own, and they tell me that they hope I
get pregnant because I'd deserve it. I would never go up to a couple who desired
a child and tell them I hope they find out they're infertile, because they
deserve it. I'm not a flaming asshole. A suitable response has yet to be given
after I point this out, as the usual responses I get run the gamut from "You're
just a child-hater!" to "It's not the same thing at all!" to "You're just
clouding the issue!"
Country: Spain
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