Despite our best efforts to dissuade you, many of you have still decided to write to us with your problems, complaints and crises of the moment. We don't have a trained therapist on staff, and this isn't "Dear F*ckin' Abbey", but we DO have Bonnie, who has graciously volunteered her time and heartless perspectives in order to minister to (or macerate) the misguided, with "Dear Fuckin' Bon..."

October 28, 2001

I read the things that you wrote about sending you email, but I'm still going to ask you something because I have nothing to lose and as I don't know you I don't care what you may think of me. If you don't want to read my whole mail then here is just the question:If a person is really disturbing you and you would like to annoy that person how would you do that?(and you don't want to give him the silent treat)

Go away? Why are you hanging out with people who disturb you? Is this a work problem? If not YOU may be your problem. If you're asking about revenge you've come to the wrong place. We're about owning our OWN responsibilities, not about manipulation, revenge, or self-serving bullshit, which is what the above amounts to.

As a matter of fact, had you really been conscious when reading the site, you'd have found that we are ruthlessly blunt when addressing your kind of behavior.

("Was your head with you all day?" ~Bill Cosby)

For all the years I've been living I've been a 'nice' person. (nice:the way you define it) And it sucks. Because as a person I'm nowhere and the things aren't going the way I want them to go... at all. And to change that, that's something that I have to do myself.

True, you have to change your own life/behavior/character. You must take responsibility for yourself, rather than being angry or having a "pity party for one" (tip of hat to JadeSyren) or thinking of ways to STAY around the same people but get back at them.

I've been trying to be nice to a lot of people to have friends but now I'm realising that they are nothing but a bunch of irritant persons (men and women). So I've been to all that trouble and what am I now? Acomplete moron. So I'm trying to change that. All those annoying people can screw my dog and I've stopped being nice to them. But I'd rather annoy them

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's take this point by point. Now rather than taking responsibility for "doing it yourself" you're irritated because they wouldn't let you manipulate them (you didn't get the desired result)?

That does make you a complete moron, but not because of the results. It's because of your reason for being "nice" (manipulation). Is there any light glimmering through the fog, or should I get a humongous horn?

I gather your dog has annoyed you as well? People who expect perfect behavior from pets and children without providing kindness and proper training really shouldn't have pets or children. I'm feeling very concerned about your dog.

And of *course* you'd rather hang about annoying the people who didn't toe the line (and buy your bullshit). Because moving on and taking responsibility for yourself would be sooooo, soooo...(ooo, what's that word? Oh! Mature.)

than just ignore so that's what I'm asking you. If you really can't stand a person that is disturbing you the whole time and you would want to annoy him/her how would you do that? (and you dont want to just give that person the silent treat because I'm already very good in that)

Thank you
P

P, YOUR homework is to go to the rants page, and read all the manipulator rants. I do realize you're female and many rants target manipulative or controlling men but you're a manipulator all the way, not a "nice" person.

You should feel honored, that homework is a two-fer, because I'm sure you'll recognize yourself in them AND you'll find out what techniques Heartless Bitches find REALLY annoying as well.

I'm thinking you're probably pretty well versed in them already.

bon

Dear Fuckin' Bon

I wrote to Natalie with a question that she forwarded to you and I'd like to add something to that. Your website inspired me in a difficult time and I'm thankfull for that but the word bitch as everybody in my country uses it, stands more for a mean women. So I asked that question because I thought you might know also something about that. I know very well that the website is much more than what I asked. I just wanted to say that.

People relate to what they have in them. Based on your question (paraphrase "How can I annoy and harass someone rather than moving on with my life") you are one of the people our website targets. Interesting that you misread and misunderstood enough to feel inspired.

And you go on to further show that you don't get it by arguing about the use of the word BITCH, and one does not have to read very far on this site to find that it's part tongue-in-cheek, and part taking back the word.

Thank you not so heartlessly like Natalie
P

*waving bye-bye from the very boat you missed*

(and standing) heartlessly beside Natalie,
bon