E-Mail 'It only takes a Girl' To A Friend

Natalie P.

Email a copy of 'It only takes a Girl' to a friend

* Required Field






Separate multiple entries with a comma. Maximum 5 entries.



Separate multiple entries with a comma. Maximum 5 entries.

Loading ... Loading ...

Leave a Comment

If you would like to make a comment, please fill out the form below.

Name

Email

Website

Comments

 

1 comment so far
  1. Stephanie Kjaerbaek August 28, 2012 2:45 am

    The problem with ‘family guys’.
    They are always in a rush to marry, not that marriage is a bad thing, but they may have left a wife in the dust or an ex-girlfriend with kids. They are pushy with women, and expect them to follow and not to walk as an equal by their side. They misinterpret a desire for equality as a desire to lead and control, when they are the ones who are controlling. These narcissists call women selfish for caring about themselves, as if basic self-interest and self-respect constituted narcissism. Narcissism requires a desire to control others, and a desire to control oneself is markedly deficient of this feature. I doubt these narcissists could take criticism.
    These family guys get upset when the women they like decide to date someone else more attractive, wealthy, or interesting than them. They resent women who have clearly stated they do not want to move in or get married to them, or possibly anyone, at this point, but get angry when several years or months up the road, their former girlfriends choose someone else. They hate women who divorce them, and seek to punish and control them by not seeing their kids, slandering them publicly, harassing them, interfering with their lives, and denying alimony and child support to them.
    They think that women who have sex before marriage, or ones who are divorced, are ‘impure’, thought it is highly unlikely that they have never had sex in their lives, and usually fantasize about Barbie-type porn stars or cute Asian women, as small sizes have always preoccupied. The smallness of stature is a sign of their lack of intellect, not that there is anything wrong with Asian women or petite blondes to begin with. It is the attitude of these men that is the problem.
    These men constantly criticize women’s clothing, though they found their initial dress attractive. They seek to change their girlfriend’s image in a matter of months, usually to make them more like their mother. They expect their girlfriends to act like a cross between their mother, a nun, a prostitute, a caregiver, and Mary Poppins, completely nurturing and subservient. All dissent, or rather natural individual deviation that is inherent to humanity, is read as an ‘attitude problem’ by these men. They complain that women are ‘too smart’, ‘too assertive’, ‘not in their proper place’, ‘act like sluts’, ‘are golddiggers’, and the like. They resent the vote and all that has happened since then, but their mentality is out of the cotton-picking and sharecropping age, and belongs back there.
    Family guys obsess too much over children, and act as if women who refuse to have kids are selfish. Having a child is a personal choice, and not an automatic obligation of women. Having children is not even a requirement of marriage these days. Family guys push women to have kids before they are ready, and chastize, attack, and even harass them into having kids. There is birth control sabotage at work in some of these relationships, with family guys threatening to take away the Pill and refusing to participate in the use of contraception by opposing diaphragms, the Sponge, condoms, spermicide and other forms of birth control.
    Many family guys are jealous of women who make money than they do. That these women slogged their way through companies, went to college to educate themselves, saved, spent wisely, invested, and started their own companies, and that all of this actually matters, does not occur to them. They expect women to acquiesce to their demands to place them, and only them, first at the expense of their own careers. There is no guarantee that marriage will work, and dependency is a dangerous position for women, as there is always the possibility that the man who supports them will leave, experience a drop in income, or get fired or laid off. If the marriage or relationship fails, the woman is stuck without the self-supporting career she had before, at her own expense, and hardly to the benefit of men.
    Two incomes are usually better than one. Family guys want large families and never consider the psychological and physical toll of each pregnancy on their chosen victim. They are not the ones typically stuck with breastfeeding, diaper changes, night wakeup routines, cleaning, and other duties, which are left to the women. Family guys, like most men, still expect a woman to look perfect and thin after giving birth multiple times, and to find some magical way to make one income spread over four or five mouths that require constant feeding. One income must pay for the required large house with pool, yard, and toys. With pregnancy comes certain risks, such as hypertension and gestational diabetes, and the risk of bleeding during childbirth. Caesarian sections are commonplace, and painful. They leave permanent scarring on the belly. It is hard to look perfect and thin without stretch marks and sagging breast after four children. These family guys are not the ones who get up in the middle of the night to deal with four children, as they sleep soundly. Some snore heavily and expect women to put up with it. The women must sleep in the same bed as them, even if they would prefer not to.
    Family guys always seem to be the ones who require large-screen televisions, expensive minivans,
    long vacations, various fast food indulgences on a daily basis, Starbuck’s, and other goodies. They figure that they can spend the money they make on themselves, and determine how their wives spend their money, a way of controlling them. This keeps them in the delusion that they somehow rule over women, and are head of the household.
    There is always money for their toys, but no money for ‘indulgences’ by women–manicures, pedicures, massages, haircare, and the like–which are generally cheaper than large-screen televisions. An addiction to cars or electronics is far more pricy, along with expensive and unnecessary sporting equipment, than a $100 blouse or a $50 skirt purchased every two months. These family guys berate women for being attractive, and are jealous of men who pay attention to their looks, and then turn around and complain that their women wear jeans and sneakers, while berating them for making an effort to look good, and then turning around and expecting them to.
    Many family guys have an addiction to porn and even frequent strip clubs for lap dances, pure hypocrisy if family and monogamy is what they value. Apparently, women have no sexuality. They can reject women for being too tall or curvy but get upset if women reject them for their lack of looks, sexual appeal, or the failure of them to create chemistry. Women choose men whose company they enjoy, and for dating and romance, sexual desire and chemistry are natural requirements. Family guys struggle with the meaning of basic ideas from women, and always seek to change a no to a yes, as they think it is a challenge, comeon, or basis for negotiation. No means no, and it is the same for women as it is for men. Women are accused of having a secret agenda, as if they spend all day coming up with secret agendas and battles against men so as to confuse and control them, such evil-minded types as they are.
    Family guys use religion, culture, family values, law and politics against women, in order to ensure that archaic values and ideals are held against women. It is not surprising that many family guys are racist douchebags who look down on homosexuality and bisexuality. Family guys will never make good husbands, as self-absorption is never a good way to start with marriage. They condone rape and domestic violence, as if these were normal, everyday activities that should be tolerated by women for the sake of marriage and ‘sexual freedom’. Women are blamed for harassment, rape, cheating, abuse, domestic violence, and exploitation all the time, as opposed to the people who engage in this behavior. Women are better off without these types, secretly control freaks masquerading as ‘nice guys’ with claims that they appreciate family and children better than others, as if they were superior in character and moral clarity.
    Family guys like to be friends with women, and ignore the fact that most women consider their males friends to be friends and nothing more. They do not care to deal with jealousy or anger over rejection, and often face accusations of ‘using’ or ‘misleading’ or ‘hurting’ these men, when in fact, they have done nothing. Even sleeping with someone or dating someone is not a guarantee of a relationship or any desirable permanent outcome, and a psychologically healthy male should be able to shrug off the end of a relation with a woman within a few days to a few weeks.
    Family guys can be too geeky and too romantic, and dress the wrong way. They are too old-fashioned and proper, and harshly critical. They fail to understand the diversity of thinking and behaviors amongst women, and card all women as the same, as if they were a special brand on the shelf. They cannot justify or understand any deviation for their prescribed set of expectations, and live in the delusion, attempting to hold onto a fake and manufactured image of women from the media and television.