Family Ties

by Natalie P.

April 27, 2009 | Filed Under Lifestyles of the Heartlessly Bitchy | 1 Comment

I’ve been a bit absent lately due to a bunch of outside pressures, not the least of which was my mother in hospital. If you saw my earlier post about bloomex, you’ll have some idea of what was going on. 

She was diagnosed, via routine colonoscopy, with suspected bowel cancer.  Fortunately, she was able to get in for a CAT scan, and then surgery in relatively short order – just over 6 weeks from diagnosis to surgery. At one point, her biggest fear was “that I’ll lose my asshole.”. Yep, that’s my mom. 

She finally came to terms with the thought that she might be on a colostomy bag for the rest of her days, but her doctor assured her they would do everything they could to “save her asshole” if they could.

He saved it by THIS much (she shows you just 1/4 inch between thumb and forefinger). She came out of hospital last week, and is back on her feet, running around like nothing has happened.

And the biopsy results came back within a week: the tumor was benign.

WHEW. 

We can ALL heave a sigh of relief, not just because she doesn’t have to do chemo, and we don’t have that big “C” word hanging over our heads, but also because now maybe she’ll stop nagging ME to go have a colonoscopy… at least for a little while.

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1 comment so far
  1. philosimphy May 22, 2009 8:32 am

    Yes.

    Save Our Assholes!

    6 years ago my mother was diagnosed with colon cancer and died 17 days later. She was 59 years old.

    It’s become rather important to me to try to remove some of the shame from our assholes. Constipated? Fart too much? Can’t fart at all? Dull but persistant lower back pain? or migraines (specially if they make you sweat) – then pay attention to your shits, if you aren’t dropping them daily (at the very least!) and you eat like a normal person – all that shit packed up in there is probably where your pain is coming from.

    Some folks think it’s vulgar. Why use THOSE words when other – less icky – words would work?

    Because if talking about your asshole embarrasses you when it’s working relatively correctly, how on earth are you going to have the courage to articulate it when it stops working correctly?

    Yes.

    Save Our Assholes.

    ~~~~~
    And go get a colonoscopy, for chrissake. What are ya? Chicken?


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