ANTI-VALENTINE'S DAY CONTEST - Deborah Dates a Momma's Boy
Now I look back and laugh, but this soured me on guys, love, and
valentines day for years.
Just after I finished high school and was going
into the service-the Army, for which I'd taken their qualification exam
and had been told I was definitely officer school qualified. I was
looking forward to the day my recruiter could set up the dates for my
advanced accessment exam and boot camp that would get me OUT of our
"sweet little town". My grandmother decided I should meet a few "nice
young men" before I left. Since my mother and I lived in her house, to
be nice and not disappoint her, I consented to go on a date or two.
The
most memorable one started with a guy a year older than I was. Grandma
had been friends with his mother for years, and thought I would like him.
The date started with him and his mother coming over for dinner about 6
o'clock. Grandma was a good cook, and the dinner went relatively well.
It was the best part of the evening. Afterwards, we were given a pair of
tickets to the local theatre, ad told to have a nice time -after his
mother pulled out her wallet and handed him some money while saying "be
nice on your date, honey." That raised my first eyebrow.
He also didn't
have a driver's licence because, as he told me, his mother always drove
him around. So I drove us to the theatre. There were two movies
playing. One was some very sappy family flick, and the other was a
passable action movie. He didn't like violence, but since I was his
date, I got to pick what we saw. The movie wasn't bad, and except for
the fact he tried to hold my hand, those two hours were o.k. Afterwards,
we went out for ice cream, and after quietly having a sundae while not
watch him pig out on a jumbo banana split, decided to end the evening. I
told him I was getting tired and would like to go home after dropping
him off at his house. With an apparent look of sympathy, he said fine
and we left. When we got there, he asked me to come in for a moment while
he got some aspirin for me before I went home. I did, and things went
from a bad date to the bizarre.
One entire wall of the living room
looked like the inside of a shrine to Mary and the Saints -numerous
figurines, lit candles, rosaries, ashtrays with sand and incense cones
in them, several Bibles, and numerous other things I couldn't and didn't
want to know about on several small tables.
He came out with the aspirin
and a glass of water. Seeing me staring at the mini-church, he handed me
everything and said "mom's a little religious at times." I asked him if
he had any plans to move out at any time, which resulted in a questioning
expression and his saying he hadn't thought about it yet. By then, I was
ready to run to the car as fast as possible. He walked me out of the
house and down the driveway. I opened the door to get in when he asked
me to wait a moment, that he had something he wanted me to have. After
patting his pockets for a few minutes, he said he must have left it up
in the house. I told him this had been a memorable enough night,and I
really needed to go home and rest. He then trumped his mother's little
shrine by saying that I was as nice as grandma had said I would be, and
that he would like me to marry him and come to live with them. I stood
against the car door in absolute shock.
After about a minute, I opened
the door, sat down, and told him I didn't know him well enough and would
have to think about it. I started the car, said goodbye, backed out and
got out of there so fast I was surprised not to have been pulled over.
When I got home, mom and grandma asked how the date went. I told them
everything sparing no detail, and told grandma I was going to ask my
recruiter to schedule my exam and boot camp for as soon as as he could
squeeze me in. Looking at them both, I said goodnight and ran up to my
room, locking the door behind me. And this was actually on a valentine's
day weekend.
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