Dear Auntie Dote,

 

Hello, I have been dating this guy for about a year, he is about 12 years older then me and very smart. I took every thing he said to be true but about 6 mo. into are dating he steel would not talk to me when he went home and the only # I had was his work cell phone that was until his boss called me and asked me who I was, then he got another phone that only I call him on mine you he has another phone that I can not have the # to because well I don't know I have never gotten an answer. ringing the bells in my head I did a back ground check on him every thing he told me was a lie and yet again I like a "fool" started to trust him. he had a good reason behind his lies. He said that he didn't know me and wanted to make sure that I was not crazy and all he wanted was a one night thing and then he like me and didn't know how to tell me the truth. I think he is steel with his wife and I want to call her and exposed him but my mother thinks that I need to walk away and forget about him all I want to do is make him pay for what he has done and find out why would a man date some one tell them they love them and steel be married. 
Helpless 

Mama knows best. You aren't helpless. You are just ignoring all the red flags. Wake up and smell the coffee, this guy is a lying liar and a cheating cheater. You are smarter than you think, you just deny yourself fair use of what you already know.

Don't prove me wrong by seeking revenge or overdue explanations. It's the simplest reason for deception on earth, and I quote:

Good Thing (TM).

He's got a Good Thing with you because you give him all the lovin' and let him get away with deception. The best revenge you can possibly get is to take his Good Thing away. What more is there to do? Or say?

-A.D.